


Joltik's Asagao Drabbles

by Hinganbachuru (Twilight_Joltik)



Category: Asagao Academy: Normal Boots Club
Genre: Also some AUs, Covers lots of pairings and scenarios probably, Drabbles, F/F, Gen, M/M, Other
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-11-26
Updated: 2018-02-22
Packaged: 2018-09-02 06:38:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 44
Words: 24,279
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8654647
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Twilight_Joltik/pseuds/Hinganbachuru
Summary: A collection of Asagao-related works too short to feel justified in posting them on their own.





	1. [Jeff/Paul ft Nick and Josh] Friendly Chat

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sort of a gift for my good friend Captain Tomate! She loves the Politics Husbands more than anything, so I'd been meaning to write some for her! Hopefully this will suffice~

Being approached by Nick and Josh, on the best of days, was a sign your life was going to get a bit more chaotic, at least momentarily. But when you had recently started dating their other best friend? Well, chaotic was a benign word, it seemed. 

 

“Jeff, I believe we need to have a… conversation,” Nick started, in an saccharine voice only used by those trying to mask venom. 

 

Well that sounded threatening. Jeff looked between Nick and Josh, a lump forming in his throat. 

 

“A-about what?”, he stuttered out, but he full and well knew.

 

Josh didn’t even bother with the pretence of kindness, he just cut straight to a scowl. “You’re dating our Paul. Do you know what this means?”

 

He wanted to say something to the effect of “oh, I knew what I signed up for, a human ball of stress and hijinks,” but that seemed a bit too… sarcastic to start out with. Hardly a first impression on his boyfriend’s best friends, but the first since they’d made it known they were together. 

 

So he just nodded hesitantly, wordlessly. Was he coming off as too timid? Too nervous? Not strong enough? God, even doing nothing was nerve-wracking. 

 

Josh suddenly transitioned into a wink. “It means that, by association, you’ll be stuck with us for a while.”

 

“So you’ll have to get used to us, alright?”, Nick added with a small grin. 

 

He looked between the two of them once more. Had they been trying to scare him or something? Why were they all smiles now?

 

“Um, so you aren’t gonna threaten me?”

 

Their expressions seemed sinister for a split second. “Well, I don’t think that needs saying,” Josh said in a low voice, more breath than word. 

 

Nick’s smile grew wider and only a little terrifying. “But you’ve made our Paulie pretty happy, just keep that up and we’ll be fine, alright?”

  
The two walked away, leaving Jeff gripping the table so hard his knuckles were white. Nope. Maybe it would have been easier if they’d just threatened him outright...


	2. [Ensemble] Grudge Match

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tumblr Prompt from Poketin, thanks for the idea!

Just another afternoon at the arcade, a few of the Hidden Block and Normal Boots guys hanging out together, pretty much just a lazy Saturday. 

 

Or, lazy until Jared noticed a new-looking set of DDR Machines had been placed in the room, prompting him to pull Wallid away from his place at the Greaves cabinet. 

 

“Hey, no fair, we were close to beating the dungeon!”, Wallid objected, trying to struggle back towards the game. At least, until he noticed DDR. “Wait, so, you’re asking for a rematch?”

 

Jared gave a mischievous laugh. “I’d never come so close to someone beating me at a sport of grace. I thought you might have a bit more of a fair shot at Dog Drug Reinforcement.”

 

As the two took their places at the machine, Luke frowned. “This is unfair, you guys…”, he muttered. “How the heck am I supposed to choose someone to root for? You’re both my friends!”

 

Wallid turned around from the machine and sent his friend a wink. “How about this: you play the winner?”

 

Luke’s eyes lit up. “Sounds good! But I’ll make sure you don’t win!”

 

“Sounds like a plan,” said Jared, smirking. “I’ll grind both of your prides into the ground!”

 

“No way!”, Jirard objected. “I wanted to play next!”

 

Satch suddenly pulled out a notebook and a pen before Luke or anyone could complain. “Alright, so if you all want to play, and presumably, all against each other, the best idea is a simple tournament, with the losers playing each other, then the winners playing each other, and the loser of the winners’ game playing the winner of the loser’s if you still feel like playing. We’ll start with Jared versus Wallid and Jirard versus Luke, alright?”

 

The two scrolling through the song selection both suddenly grew pale. They’d heard legends of Jirard’s skills at DDR. Horror stories, even. Neither wanted to play that kind of skill. 

 

“Eh, y-you two c-c-can play each other if you want,” Wallid stuttered out. “I r-really would rather get back to Greaves after this.”

 

Jared nodded as he finally seemed to settle on a song. “Yeah, I only want the one match too.”

 

“You’re afraid to lose, aren’t you?”, Jirard questioned flatly.

 

“You completed an entire cabinet with max scores!”, Jared exclaimed. “I’m not bad, but you?”

 

Jirard frowned. “Dammit, I wanted to play against someone.”

 

“I’ll still take you!”, Luke offered. “Sounds like a challenge!”

 

The smile returned to Jirard’s face. “Thanks, man! It’ll be fun!”

  
  



	3. [Caddy and Wallid] Black Dye

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a little headcanon/AU/something of mine. Also partially based on a true story. Don't eat coffee ice cream before bed, kids.

Caddy hadn’t really ever been the type to wake up at one in the morning and suddenly be completely unable to stand still let alone lie down. Then again, he also didn’t realize that ice cream Jimmy had gotten for him was coffee flavored, or that coffee flavored meant it actually contained caffeine, or he wouldn’t have eaten it so late. 

 

Even trying to go back to sleep seemed a bad idea- he’d been having some, to put it lightly, “interesting” dreams that made him sincerely grateful he wasn’t friends with any mind readers. But, well, Jimmy had mentioned him sleep talking before, making him slightly- or rather deathly afraid that he might have done so that night and been heard. Because he didn’t really want any of that to go beyond his head, and even trying to think about why he might have had such… peculiar dreams about Moosey made him want to scream loudly. 

 

Sleep was no longer an option. All Caddy could think to do was walk around, preferably not in his room because some people could actually sleep and he didn’t want to take that from Jimmy, even if he was a bit to blame. But, well, there were only so many places he could go past curfew without bending a few rules he couldn’t really afford to get caught on, so he just found himself entering the bathroom, hoping pacing around there wouldn’t get him in too much trouble. 

 

But, as he opened the door to the men’s room, his ears were assaulted by a loud, startled cry. It made him stumble backwards and consider running until he realized who’d screamed, which due to being seated between sinks on the counter and wearing an oversized and endlessly stained t-shirt, was a bit difficult. 

 

“Oh, just you. Morning, Wallid,” Caddy sighed. His mind started to process what he was seeing. His friend sitting on the counter, a bowl of something black beside him and a brush with the back stuff on it in his hand, like he’d been putting it on his head. “Are you… dying your hair?”

 

“Um, yeah…”, Wallid muttered. “I- I’m not a huge fan of its natural color, the roots were starting to show. D-don’t tell anyone about this, alright?”

 

Caddy took a few steps forward, squinting in the harsh light. Wallid was right, his “natural hair color” was showing. A pale color he couldn’t entirely make out, one that looked more unnatural than his black hair. It was more pink than anything else, but maybe that was just the light. 

 

“You… need any help?”, he offered. 

 

Wallid shook his head, flinging a few specks of black dye around by accident. “No, no, it’s fine. Just, um, please don’t tell anyone, alright?”

 

Confusion caused him to nod and take a few steps backwards without even so much as procuring an answer to why he didn’t want anyone to know. Frankly, he didn’t think anyone would care, but maybe that was Wallid’s business to figure out. 

  
Still, something about the encounter drained him of all the nervous energy he had and left him more willing to let those crazy dreams come back and hit him with all they had. Maybe it was just a one-in-the-morning sort of thing, but he felt a bit unnerved by the whole encounter. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Also known as AU where Wallid has pink hair and has since becoming a magical girl but dyes it because he doesn't want to be marked as a main character.


	4. [Jared/Unspecified] Smiling Machine

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Honestly I'm not sure who the POV "you" is supposed to be. Not nessisarily a reader insert, but they can be if you want.

He offers to make you tea, and you start to wonder if perhaps Kakusu and Jacques aren't the only robots at Asagao.

  
You can't deny he’s fascinating to watch. Every movement is methodical, to say the least. Mechanical to put it bluntly. Beautiful with all the emotional attachment of a microwaved dinner. He performs every last motion flawlessly, as if in his sleep.

  
“What’s the point of this anyways?” It seems a fair question, but he does respond until everything’s flawlessly set on the table, until you've taken a sip of the tea. It's good, you can tell that much, but it's hardly your type. Maybe with a bit of sugar and cream, but for now you just bear it with a meaningless smile to match his.

  
“The point is to do the thing well, I suppose,” he answers, his robotic poise slowly dropping away. A moment’s pause, he takes a careful sip of his own tea. Then, he chuckles wryly. “Honestly, I've never thought about it.”

  
Then again, you suppose, it's always when he shuts down and doesn't think that he excels at what others call his talents. A mechanical model, a robotic heartbreaker, a machine shining brightly, catching eyes with a painted on smile.

  
It's a shame really, his real smile is much brighter anyhow. If you weren't one of the few to actually see it, perhaps he wouldn't view it as so worthless.

 

 

 

 


	5. [Caddy and Jimmy] Cosplay Reference

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Got this anon on Tumblr: Jimmy stealing Creeps' mask to use it as cosplay ref (and obviously his roommate knows but what is he supposed to do ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯). Gave me maybe too many ideas.

Caddy came into the dorm room to find it covered with papers, his roommate sprawled across the floor. Honestly, he was afraid to ask, especially when he noticed what looked like... drafting pencils? Shane had called them that once, those super nice looking mechanical ones. 

Well, okay, just a little glance. Jimmy hadn’t looked up yet, so he figured he was safe to at least lean over, see what he was working on. Seemed there was some sort of sketch of what looked to be a pretty elaborate costume, along with something else, shiny and yellow and half-obscured by his arm. 

Bending down a bit more, he realized what it was he was looking at: costume designs. A dozen different drafts, some with flowing skirts, others long coats, a few others not finished enough to tell what they were supposed to have been. But, they had one feature in common: a mask, with pointed ears and a scribbled-on face. 

The mask looked freakishly familiar, actually. Almost like it was trying to emulate... oh. Oh! That’s what Jimmy had next to him, the weird yellow thing. 

“Why the hell’d you take Creeps’ mask?”, Caddy questioned out loud, and Jimmy jumped, taking an earbud out and looking up. 

His answer was much flatter than his physical response. “Reference.”

“For... what, cosplay?”

Jimmy nodded. “Kakusu gave me the idea, wanted to dress up as a human form of her favorite new Nokemon- you know, Mimichomp, the one that dresses up like Pikachomp? And I thought a mask like Creeps’ would be perfect, if I just traced it out or molded it and scribbled a face on.”

Seemed reasonable. Theft, maybe, but reasonable. “So, when are you gonna give that back.”

A shrug. “Eh. He has a whole drawer full of them, he won’t miss one.”

“So, when I tell Wallid?”

His roommate’s expression fell to an unamused frown. “He... wouldn’t care,” he started, sounding a bit hesitant. “He knows there’s a ton of them.”

“Your best friend’s favorite teacher, hope that won’t interfere with his Magical Girl gig,” Caddy went on. Jimmy puffed up his cheeks in annoyance. 

Before Caddy could react, he felt something thrown at his chest. It bounced off, and into his hand, and he found himself frowning at the mask that’d hit him. “What, you want me to take this back?”

“If you care so much, sure,” Jimmy offered with a smirk. 

God, his roommate was annoying sometimes.


	6. [Jared/PBG] Flirtmaster

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know what this is. I don't know what formatting is. This isn't even the prompt I started writing with. Thanks to the-artistic-mogeko though~

Jared felt his face burning. That was a new feeling, he was usually the one making everyone and their estranged third cousin-in-law flustered. But wow, he had no idea how to take the string of texts PBG has just sent him. 

**-Heya hot stuff**

**-That jacket looks nice on you**

**-But you know where it would look better??**

**-MY FLOOR**

He prayed no one was looking over his shoulder or could tell he was covering his face. That was… wow, was this what he made people feel? He wanted to scream a little, really, least of all because yeah, PBG was the last person he expected to say something like that. But, the confidence suited him, and he tried to compose himself enough to reply. 

_-slow down a bit_

_-at least buy me dinner first ;)_

It felt like it took ages for a response to come up, and Jared was tempted to add more but those little dots made him curious as to what was coming next. 

And thought he wasn’t sure what to expect from the next, it wasn’t…

**-OH MY GOD IM SO SORRY**

**-LUKE TOOK MY PHONE THAT WASNT ME I SWEAR**

Jared found himself feeling a bit disappointed as he tried to respond. 

_-=(_

_-thought u finally learned how to flirt_

He could practically hear PBG blushing. 

**-OH**

**-UH**

Another awkwardly long pause.

**-You do look nice tho =)**

A small smile appeared on Jared’s face. That was more like his PBG.

_-well ur not bad at flirting i guess_

_-but im the flirtmaster_

The reply came much quicker. 

**-I wont deny that**

**-But Im getting better!**

Shaking his head, Jared could only think that naive kid needed to be reminded that he was about a Level 3 to his Level 80.

_-sure u r_

A pause for dramatic effect. 

_-its cute when u act like u know what ur doing_

_-adorable even_

PBG’s response was almost blisteringly fast.

**-If Im so cute why don’t you come over here**

That didn’t make any sense, but Jared got the point.

_-k sounds gr8_

_-i_

A hand rested lightly on his shoulder. Jared jumped and accidentally pressed send in the process. PBG was smiling at him, almost flirtatiously. 

He was right, flirting did suit him.


	7. [Mai -> Hana] Erasing myself from the narrative

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another anon prompt from good old Tumblr, this one for angst. So, as much as I'd love to let my girls be happy, have some not-so-happy Mai/Hana.

Hana walked into their room to find it empty, save for her things. The lights on the wall, the blankets on the top bunk, the posters on the wall- it was like Mai had erased every trace of herself.

Tears filled her eyes. “Mai?”, she called out. Was this some kind of joke? What was going on?

Frantically, she looked for a note, for something to explain what was going on. And, on top of her sheets, next to Mister Bunny, was the only thing that didn’t belong to her in the room: a tape recorder.

She couldn’t stop shaking enough to properly press play for a solid minute, but when she did, she only started crying more.

“Hey, Hana,” her roommate’s voice greeted. Even through the grainy recording, she sounded tired. 

“I… I know you’re probably wondering what’s going on, I know you’re probably scared but, believe me when I say it’s better this way, okay?”

No, no, Hana didn’t like how that sounded.

“Shane tried to stop me, you know? Not from disappearing, but from… well, why I had to. I don’t want to explain it, it’d only make it hurt more, but, well, he knew what I was going through.”

Mai, please, she begged internally. She should have told her what was bothering her, Mai should have let her help!

“Don’t blame yourself, there’s nothing you could have done,” Mai’s voice assured her. “And, I’m not gone. I’m just gone from you. The second you finish listening to this, you’ll forget all about me. Someone else will be your best friend. I’ll be part of someone else’s story.”

All the words sounded strange to Hana’s ears. “But I don’t want you to go!”, she screamed, as if Mai could hear her. “I want you to stay…”

The voice on the recording laughed. “Hana, I’m so sorry, I did my best but… I can’t take watching you like this over and over again. Every time, someone hurts you, every time, you hurt someone, and I can’t- I can never… You’d love a bird before me.”

What on earth was Mai talking about? Hana was as confused as she was sad. 

“I should have listened to everyone who told me this was a bad idea,” Mai’s voice said shakily. “I should have never fallen in love with a main character. Only sadness can come from that.”

No, no, Mai needed to stop, she needed to come back. Hana never wanted to hurt Mai, she was her best friend, Mai was her whole world, Mai was the only one who’d always been there for her no matter what! 

“Goodbye, Hana,” Mai almost whispered. Hana could barely hear the last part over her own tears. 

“I love you.”

A few moments passed in a thoughtless daze until Hana felt herself being shaken awake. 

“Hana! Hana, are you okay?”

Looking up, Hana saw her roommate looking at her, clearly concerned. 

“Um, yeah…”, Hana muttered. She didn’t feel okay. Actually, she felt quite sad, but she wasn’t sure why. 

Her roommate frowned at her. “Have you been crying?”

“Huh?” She reached up to touch her face without thinking. Her hand came back wet. “I guess… maybe? I can’t remember why, though.”

“Well, if you remember, I’m happy to talk about it,” she was kindly assured.

Hana gave a shaky smile in response. “Thanks, Mimi. I can always count on you.”


	8. [Jimmy -> Wallid] Regrets and Roses

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another anon tumblr prompt, and I regret nothing because this is a good pairing even if it's one sided!

The club room was covered in flowers. Mostly roses, pink and red and white, with a few white flowers he didn’t recognize sticking out unnaturally. 

Frankly, Wallid wasn’t sure what to make of it any more than he knew what to say to Jimmy, who was sitting in the middle of it, refusing to make eye contact with him. But, he’d been the one to send him a text asking to come to the room, so all the flowers, those were probably his doing. 

Slowly, as to not scare him off, he approached his friend, put a hand on his shoulder that made him shudder and jump. “Hey,” he softly started. “What… what’s going on here?”

A rose had fallen off one of the desks, and Jimmy picked it up and started to pick the petals off. “Nothing. Just… leave, okay? Forget about this.”

“No, tell me, I’m curious.”

Jimmy shook his head. “No, seriously, you need to forget this ever happened.”

He was confused more than anything, but the second strongest feeling was worry. “Are you alright, at least?”, he questioned, squeezing his friend’s shoulder.

“I- I did this…”, Jimmy admitted. “But, I kinda regret it now. I wanted to tell-”

His eyes scanned over the flowers as Jimmy tried to get his words sorted out. Even if he knew next to nothing about the meanings of flowers, he knew enough to know what roses meant. Hell- he knew enough just from the fact there were flowers alone.

“You like someone?”, he guessed. 

A nod. Jimmy muttered something under his breath, something that sounded a lot like an apology.

“What for?”

His only response was a gesture to the numerous flowers. 

“You… probably hate me now, huh?”, Jimmy questioned

“No, I just… I don’t understand. You’re… in love with…who, me?”

Some part of him wanted to be wrong, but another kinda was happy when Jimmy softly replied with a “…yeah”.

“Or well,” he quickly amended. “I wouldn’t go that far. I like- um… I get that it’s pointless, though. I’m just your friend, that’s fine. But, somewhere deep inside me, I still have hope you’ll fall in love with me.” He laughed bitterly. “Isn’t that lame?”

Lame wasn’t the word he was looking for. No, that was the last word he’d use. No one’d ever gotten him flowers before, let alone a whole room full. Even if he’d never really thought of Jimmy like that, he certainly liked the thought of someone caring that much. “This is… really sweet, you know?”

“Don’t change the subject!”, Jimmy protested. “Just, tell me how much you hate me or something!”

Hate him? “Why?”

“Be-because I’m trying to guilt you into liking me!”, he exclaimed. “Because I want your love bad enough to put on a show like this! Because I’m selfish and stupid and-”

He couldn’t bear to hear him talk like that a second longer. So, he cut him off with a hug. “Stop. Please.”

A weak “huh?” was the first response, but Jimmy slowly returned the hug. “O-okay…”

“For if I ‘like you’, well, I don’t have an answer for you right now,” Wallid explained. “But, I definitely don’t hate you. Even if just as your friend, I still love you.”

“G-good…”


	9. [Shane and most of Normal Boots] Meteor Shower

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not a prompt this time, just something I thought up.

“Ah, there’s one!”

 

Shane looked up to see a shooting star streaking across the sky. He was supposed to make a wish, right?

 

His mind searched for things he wanted- better markers, food that reminded him of home without nearly killing him, a year and a half of his life back…

 

But really only one thing stood out, one he’d never speak out loud.

 

“I wish I could forget about Emily.”

 

The shooting star faded as soon as he could think of that simple wish. Part of him wondered if he was fast enough, but another part of him rolled his eyes at that. Wishing on a star was arbitrary and meaningless, speed wouldn’t matter. 

 

And, right as it faded, PBG excitedly blurted out the one question he didn’t want to hear.

 

“So, what did you wish for?”

 

He was asking Jon, who still looked oddly downbeat for himself. “Oh, you know, for the show to go well…”, he muttered.

 

Shane tried to decode that. Jacques was still suspiciously gone, Jon was still frowning, so there was only one real answer there.

 

“I wish I could have Jacques back.”

 

Jon gave a shaky laugh after his lie of an answer. “What about you, Peebs?”

 

PBG hummed in concentration as he looked back up at the sky. “Er, for the Strikers to do well this season?”

 

Blatant lie, he wasn’t even trying to hide it. Anyone that was paying attention knew exactly what that dork wanted, or rather, who he wanted. 

 

“I wish Hana would like me back.”

 

And then, he turned to Jirard, who kept glancing at his phone, probably checking most likely times for meteors to show up or something. “So, what about you?”

 

Jirard shrugged. “Well, to find Princess Pumpernickel! Lame, I know, but that’s something I think I need more luck than anything for at this point.”

 

Once again, Shane was reminded why he liked Jirard so much. He was honest, that was something you couldn’t say for many others. 

 

“I wished to find those stupid library books,” Satch added, and Shane found himself smiling just a little at that. Satch was honest too, sometimes to a fault. 

 

As if Satch had any of those. Seriously, it was Jared everyone always said was so perfect, but they were probably looking in the wrong place. His roommate eclipsed him in every way.

 

And speak of the devil, he finally piped up. “Well, I wished that we’d all find love and happiness!”

 

Yep. Liar, unsurprising. A nice thought, yeah, but it sounded like the kind of thing he’d want everyone to think he wished for. Probably why he spoke up in the first place, just to not sound suspicious. 

 

But what was his actual wish? Shane honestly had no clue. 

 

So, with Continue having decided that sleep was more important than team bonding, that just left Shane himself as the only one to not given an answer. But, mercifully, no one had asked him. 

 

The sky didn’t show any signs of more meteors yet, and it was hot as hell, but Shane couldn’t help but feel like it was a nice night. His friends were mostly lying assholes, sure, but at least they cared enough to invite him.


	10. [Shane/Jirard] Done Studying

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I asked for rarepair prompts on Tumblr, so expect to see quite a few of those on here. This one's from Treflev- "Your keyboard is not a pillow" Jirard/Shane maybe?

“Shane, please, you’ve studied enough,” Jirard assured his roommate. “You won’t get anywhere if you don’t get any sleep.”

In response, Shane just let out a sigh. “But I don’t understand half of this, you all learned the Plegian Wars in primary school. I need to play catchup here.”

“You know it as well as anyone does,” Jirard countered. “Better, even.”

His eyelids felt heavy, but he was still worried. He still couldn’t remember if the dark mage who switched sides was in the first or second war, he couldn’t remember the name of the second East Khan, and he sure hadn’t figured out the family tree of the Ylissean Exalts. This was all too confusing, he wasn’t going to get anywhere, the most he could do was try to cram as much in before he fell onto the keyboard and collapsed. 

Leaning forward on his elbows, he found himself rereading the page on Ferox’s involvement again and again. None of the words were sticking. 

He let out a yawn. God, he wanted to sleep. Just maybe close his eyes a minute, that couldn’t hurt, surely.

But he felt a hand on his shoulder, and then around his waist. “Sorry, you’re going to bed,” Jirard told him, pulling him upwards. 

“M’not tired…”, he weakly muttered, contradicting himself perfectly well. “Lemme keep reading.”

“You were about to fall asleep,” Jirard explained, as if he didn’t know that perfectly well. “And, well, your keyboard is not a pillow. It’d be a lot more comfortable in the bed.”

That was true… His pillow, the blankets, they were seeming more enticing by the second. 

No, he couldn’t, he tried to remind himself, practically falling out of Jirard’s grip. “No, I‘ve gotta study,” he protested, realizing too late the words came out in English. 

“You’ll do great!”, Jirard assured him as h grabbed his hand once more. Odd, maybe it was his imagination, but he could have sworn that was in English too. Granted, he knew his roommate was pretty good at it, but he didn’t speak it often in conversation. 

A weak laugh escaped his mouth, Shane realized he was getting more loopy by the second as he stumbled into his bed. His head ended up at the foot, he didn’t feel like righting himself. 

His eyes flickered closed, and he noticed a blanket being draped around his body. A second later, his head was raised up and a pillow slipped under it. 

“Night, Shane. Want me to turn your computer off?”

Later, he figured out that was probably what Jirard has said, but somehow his tired brain really only caught about half of that and he laughed again.

“Yeah, that sounds nice,” he’d muttered, and less light flooded the room. He kept expecting a kiss or something, but none came, leaving him confused and a bit upset. 

That might have explained the weird dreams he had that night, at very least.


	11. [Ian/Luke] Subtweeting

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tumblr prompt from ellieofmidnight, please forgive me for knowing nothing about how Twitter works, I had to look up what Subtweeting was.

Ian sat at the front of the club room, trying to look as serious as he could while surrounded with various shades of pink streamers. Even still, everyone was positive it was going to be a very awkward meeting. 

“So, would anyone care to tell me why Normal Boots covered our club room with all this?”, questioned Ian, gesturing at the streamers

“What makes you think it was Normal Boots?”, Jeff countered.

Silence, and then Jimmy muttered “Well who the hell else would bother?”

“Exactly.” Ian nodded and then scanned the club room. “So, who pissed them off this time? Caddy?”

He glared at Caddy for a good ten seconds before Caddy scoffed. “What, why do you always accuse me first?”

More silence. Everyone seemed to be waiting for Caddy to realize the reasoning behind this. And in time, his face fell into an annoyed scowl.

“Moosey, dear,” he started in a mock-saccharine tone. “I’ve only stolen from them once. Once! If you should be accusing anyone here, it should be Jimmy and Wallid!”

“Gee, thanks, Cads,” Jimmy scoffed. “Really gunning for me here, aren’t you?”

Wallid pouted. “Aw, we wouldn’t do anything intentional! Or well, we didn’t this time, at least.”

“I don’t think I did anything?”, Jeff offered. “I mean, all I can think of is that Nick and Josh might be a little mad at me for asking them if I could talk to Paul alone about some student council stuff? But I don’t think even they’d go this far…”

A loud sigh. It seemed the candidates for who screwed up this time had eliminated themselves, Ian thought. So that left Luke, who had been oddly quiet and didn’t seem to be paying attention. 

“Luke, what did you do?”, Ian asked rather loudly, and that seemed to snap him back to reality. 

“Oh, right. Well, you were telling me about your argument with Jon in the Film Appreciation Club, right?”

Vaguely, he recalled Jon saying his taste in movies was trash when he recommended something for the next meeting, he couldn’t even remember what it’d been. Certainly nothing to get worked up over. 

“That literally couldn’t matter less and if you got into a fight over it I will make you clean this room up all by yourself,” he assured Luke.

In turn, Luke gave an awkward chuckle. “I just subtweeted him for your honor, what’s wrong with that?”

Shaking his head, Ian walked over to the hat-wearing idiot. “It’s a stupid thing to fight about, that’s what’s wrong.”

“Aw, come on, babe, you would have done the same thing!”, Luke half laughed.

Ian huffed. “Don’t you ‘babe’ me! That was entirely pointless and I won’t thank you for it!”

Before Luke could defend himself, Ian turned around, someone had tapped him on the shoulder. Wallid, apparently, who was holding his phone to Ian’s face and smirking. He had what had to be the tweet Luke had mentioned pulled up.

“Your daily reminder that my boyfriend has the BEST taste in movies and whoever says otherwise is wrong and stupid =)”, it read.

Blood was rushing to his cheeks. “O-oh…”

“So you forgive me?”, Luke questioned.

Glancing around the club room once more, the streamers burning into his eyes, Ian just shook his head. “No, you’re still cleaning this up.”


	12. [Jared/PBG Soulmate AU] Liar Revealed

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Despite finding them cheesy as all hell, I'm a sucker for a good Soulmate AU. So I got a few Tumblr prompts for just that, hope you all enjoy that. This one's from the-artistic-mogeko, AU where it's impossible to lie to your soulmate.

Jared sighed as he hung up the phone. His mother was just… ugh. He was not in the mood today to be told everything he was doing would bring shame on his family name, he’d already tripped in front of everyone in the lunchroom and nearly spilled ramen all over Paul, and he knew he’d failed a test earlier that day. 

So, on his way back to the clubroom, he nearly started crying when he ran into someone- into PBG.

“S-sorry!”, PBG stuttered out as he backed away. “I didn’t see you there!”

“Why are you out here?”, Jared questioned, fighting to keep his voice steady and a smile on his face. 

PBG frowned a bit. Maybe that’d come off as too harsh. “Just looking for you- that phonecall just seemed sorta long. Satch said you’d be fine, but I decided to check anyways. So, er, you alright?”

Fine. He was fine. That’s all he had to say to PBG, and they could move on. “Eh, I’m f-”

The words caught in his throat. He couldn’t quite get them out. He tried again: “It’s noth-”

“Dude, seriously, what’s up?”, PBG asked. 

Jared felt his whole body tensing up. Why couldn’t he say it, why couldn’t he lie?

“I- I don’t know…”, Jared admitted. “But I’m sure it’s no bi-”

There it went again. Seriously, what was going on? He couldn’t think of any reason his throat would be catching like that. Okay, maybe one, but it was impossible, right? 

So, right as PBG opened his mouth and began with something like “You can tell me, I promise,” Jared gave one of the strangest requests he’d ever given. 

“Quick, say something that’s a complete blatant lie!”

It seemed PBG didn’t get the significance of this request, so he nodded and took a deep breath before starting off something meaningless. “I am a 400-foot tall pur-” 

He looked confused for a minute before clearing his throat. “Uh, okay, weird. Um, my name is Wal- Huh. It keeps sorta sticking, that’s weird.”

No, no, this couldn’t be right. On a completely shitty day, he’d found his soulmate by accident? His soulmate couldn’t be PBG, he’d lied around him plenty of times, even if not right to his face, and besides, PBG couldn’t like him, right? He wasn’t that lucky, to have the heart of such a ray of sunshine. 

Maybe if he tried it one more time? “Weird. Well, I’m completely, 100% alri-”

The statement ended in a coughing fit, and with PBG rushing to put a hand on his back. “Uh, what do I do? Are you choking? Do you need CPR?”

Jared struggled to draw in breath. “N-n-no, I’m not choking.”

PBG offered a kind smile and rubbed his back, seemingly without thinking. “Oh, thank god. You were worrying me.”

“You think this might mean we’re soulmates?”, Jared questioned, trying to pass it off as a joke. “I mean, not like that could-”

They caught in his throat again. PBG’s eyes widened. “Whoa… We so are! You’re right!”

Why did he seem so excited? Did PBG actually like, _like_ him or something?

Well, if they were soulmates, he could expect an honest answer to that question. “Are you okay with that?”

“Absolutely! I mean, I figured it wouldn’t be Hana- oh! Not saying you’re worse than Hana, you’re amazing, and I really like you! Not just because I can’t get Hana, but because- god, I’m really screwing this up. Can I just say yes?”

Jared’s chest felt warm. It was a pleasant feeling. “Of course.”


	13. [Jeff/Paul Soulmate AU] Loving Libel

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another Soulmate AU prompt, this one from my good friend captain-tomate! Prompt was "The one where you don’t know your soulmate until you hear them say your name", and I went in an... interesting direction with that.

Paul seemed livid, storming towards Jeff. He could only assume the source of his fellow candidate’s rage was the poster crumpled up in his hand, and all he could think was that he should have told Ian they were going too far when he had a chance. 

“Sorry!”, Jeff exclaimed, trying to edge out of the way. “Um, it was Ian’s idea, I swear!”

Still practically fuming, Paul continued to storm towards him. “Oh no, don’t you run out on me. You’re the one who actually approved posters saying I’m the bastard son of a tanuki!”

Wait, what? He must have missed that one. “Uh, okay, sorry! I’m late for, er, lunch. Gotta go, bye!”

He tried to run, he really did, but Paul came bolting after him.

“Jeff Fabre, you come back here this instant!”

But, as he said those words, the world seemed to stop for a moment. He felt a strange burning on his arm, and as his eyes darted over, he saw a black, heart-shaped mark had appeared on it. A soulmark- he’d seen it on plenty of adults, and quite a few students, even a few friends. They appeared when your destined partner said your full name, 

It seemed, however, Paul didn’t notice that had happened, just that Jeff had become a still target rather than a moving one. Wow, this was awkward. Um, what did he do to get his soulmate to not kill him? Say his name back? Would that work?

“P-Paul Ritchey, please don’t kill me?”

That seemed to at least confuse Paul, then make him let out a weird strangled gasp and look at his arm.

“Jeff? Um, maybe look at your arm?”, Paul requested, all his hostility replaced with confusion.

With a smile, Jeff raised his own arm to display the tattoo-like tiny black heart that’d just showed up.

For a moment, Paul just stared at him- at his arm, at his eyes. Then, he let out an almost pained laugh. “Well. This will be… an interesting story.”

“Y-yeah! Never thought I’d find my soulmate trying to murder me over political slander!”

His, er, soulmate frowned. “It’s in writing, that’s libel.”

Oh, right. “Libel, sorry. Um, so… what now?”

“Well, I still want you to take down those posters,” Paul half-laughed. “And I’m still gonna win this election.”

For some reason, Jeff found himself admiring that spirit. Yeah, come to think of it, he’d sorta admired Paul for a while, even if he wasn’t that great a Student Council President. 

A surge of ambition, Jeff gave a cheeky wink. “Well, you can be the First… er, Lady? Lord? Gentleman? What would you call that…” 

Another laugh, and Paul was shaking his head. “Not if I can help it!”


	14. [Wallid -> PBG] How Soccer Works

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I made a whole bunch of prompts for myself for Asagao pairs I hadn't written for yet, and I liked the Wallid/PBG one the best, so I did it first. Wallid/PBG because honestly, all I gathered from any of the soccer games on PBG's route was that Wallid was way too into them, leading to the headcanon this is based on. This one kind of sucks, though. Still, hope you enjoy~

Asagao’s soccer games were far from fun, but Luke was, at very least, obligated to go to them to cheer on his friends on the team. Jeff and PBG were very close friends of his, aside from him being in the same club as Jeff, which alone wasn’t reason enough to come. Heck, Jimmy rarely came, nor did Caddy.

 

That was an interesting point to make, because Wallid, who wasn’t particularly good friends with Jeff, had never missed a match. Luke had always sort of wondered why, but it wasn’t until that particular day that he realized why. He was half-watching the match, half-daydreaming, and then suddenly, acutely aware that Wallid was leaning forward beside him, staring straight ahead.

 

Luke mimicked the movement to try and see what he was looking at. And what did his eyes land on? One PeanutButterGamer, in the center of the field, yes, but definitely not the one with the ball. 

 

A theory started to formulate in his head. Luke chuckled and turned to his friend. “You’re here to just stare at PBG in short shorts, aren’t you?”

 

“N-no!” Quickly, Wallid turned the bright red of implausible deniability, but he took a deep breath in an attempt to maintain composure. “I mean, of course not, that’s ridiculous!”, he huffed in turn. “I simply have an interest in strategy and sportsmanship that’s all.”

 

Well, there was one way to test that. “Alright, alright. I’ll believe you, but tell me this: who’s ahead?”

 

“Uh…” Wallid trailed off, suddenly looking nervous. “Well, it’s still too early in the game to say for sure, things change so quickly!”

 

And his suspicions were more than confirmed, Wallid had no idea how soccer worked. Luke, who gave zero shits about soccer, even knew how it worked. Wallid, who appeared to care about it very much, didn’t even know how scoring worked. 

 

“Actually, we’re up three to zero,” Ian corrected dryly from behind them. Ian even knew! Ian, who would still have been asleep had Jeff not dragged him there, who’s looked up from his phone maybe twice, knew what was going on. 

 

So either Wallid was in serious denial or embarrassed with himself too much to admit it. And either way, there was an easy fix. 

 

Putting a hand on his friend’s shoulder, he leaned forward once more, idly observing PBG while Wallid seemed determined to look anywhere but there. “You know, you could just talk to him.”

 

“What? I- why would I do that?”, Wallid exclaimed, suddenly looking annoyed but also very much bright red. “I could talk to him whenever I want, you know! But I don’t have a reason to!”

 

“Other than him being attractive?”, Ian added in a monotone, and Luke became exponentially more grateful that Jeff had dragged him here. 

 

Wallid seemed resigned to simply burying his face in his hands. “He’s attractive, yes, but, agh, it’s not just… well, he’s so passionate about things he cares about!”

 

Luke could think of exactly five things PBG cared about, and one of them was sleep, so that was either another hasty excuse or Wallid just saw him differently. Which was totally possible, Wallid did sorta tend to do that, but still. 

 

“I sound stupid.” Wallid sighed into his hands. “It’s just a stupid crush, and if you two tell anyone at all-”

 

“Wouldn’t dream of it!”, Luke exclaimed. “But, I could help you talk to him, if you wanted.”

 

Looking up suddenly, Wallid stared at PBG for a moment more before giving a small nod. “Can you help me not panic, though? I’m kind of thinking I might.”

 

“You’re Wallid Freakin’ Kanaan!”, Ian countered. “Wow him with your memes and magic and shit! You’re funny and smart, why wouldn’t he want you?”

 

“Well, I can think of a few reasons,” Wallid grumbled. “For one, doesn’t he like that pink-haired girl?”

 

After a second, Ian shook his head. “Nah. I’m pretty sure she likes Jirard.”

 

“Jirard?”, Wallid repeated. “You mean the Itty Bitty Kitty guy?”

 

“Are there any other Jirards at this school I don’t know about?”, Ian questioned, and only silence answered him. 

  
Well, silence and an unsettling smirk on Wallid’s face. 


	15. [Jeff -> PBG] Pass

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Weird, I like this pairing, but I've not published anything of it yet. well, better late than never!

“You know, I think I figured out why I hate Hana,” Jeff blurted out.

 

PBG raised an eyebrow. “You hate Hana?”, he questioned. He’d never seemed like he disliked her whenever he’d mention her, so why was this the first he was hearing of it?

 

“Well, ‘hate’ is maybe too strong here,” Jeff amended. “But, I don’t like her.”

 

Still, first he was hearing about it. “Don’t like her why?”

 

“I don’t like her because she’s hurting you,” Jeff stated matter-of-factly. 

 

“She’s... hurting me?” PBG repeated, almost in disbelief. “No, no, you- you’ve got it wrong!”, he assured his friend. Why would he even think that? “She’s my friend, even if she doesn’t quite remember that yet!”

 

Sighing, Jeff glanced away from him. “I know. Even still, I hate that she makes you cry.”

 

Red flooded his cheeks as PBG quickly tried to deny the fact that he occasionally would have a good shower cry about his forgetful friend. “She doesn’t make me cry!”, he shrieked, too highly to be believable. 

 

Breathlessly laughing, Jeff turned back to him and put a hand on his shoulder. “Peebs, I’ve heard you in the locker room when you think the rest of us are gone.”

 

“You eavesdropped on me?”

 

It was Jeff’s turn to get embarrassed.“Not intentionally!”, he probably lied. “I was worried, I was checking on you! I would have tried to comfort you but… well, you were in the shower, it would have been awkward.”

 

Well, that sounded a bit more believable, so PBG turned away this time and nodded. “Er, thanks…”

 

“No problem!”, his friend exclaimed with a grin. 

 

They proceeded to sit there for a moment in awkward-as-heck silence until PBG remembered how they’d even gotten on the topic. “Um… you don’t need to hate Hana for me, though.”

 

“Well, I don’t like her for other reasons too,” Jeff added rather softly, as if hoping he wouldn’t be heard.

 

“Really?” He tried to think of potential reasons. Because they were tournament rivals? No, Jeff wasn’t that petty. Because she… nah, he didn’t know, he gave up. “Why? She’s so nice!”

 

Jeff looked away again. “Pass.”

 

“Pass?”, PBG repeated. 

 

A nod. “I pass on answering that,” Jeff stated plainly. 

 

“Do you get to do that?” Well, that might have been helpful with Jared a few times...

 

“Yes. You do.” Why had Jeff gotten so snippy all of a sudden? He added “And I pass” again after a minute, further proving the point. 

 

Well then. PBG was still curious, though, so maybe asking more wouldn’t hurt… “Why?”

 

Jeff gave the same answer, this time with a bit of a laugh. “Pass.”

 

“You’re just gonna keep passing?”

 

“Yeah.” Jeff turned back towards him and winked. “I don’t wanna tell ya!”

 

“Fine...” He gave up, he was done. Well, almost, at least.

 

PBG muttered something under his breath- nothing in particular, but tried to at least make it sound like words. 

 

Seemed to intrigue Jeff, just as he’d thought. “What was that?”

 

Meeting Jeff’s eyes, he stared at him for a little while before winking. “Pass.”

  
His friend started laughing. “Touche.”


	16. [Caddy/Shane] Angle Adjustment

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry there haven't been many of these lately, but I've got a few prompts I'm dying to do, so expect more from me soon! Hopefully. I've probably jinxed myself by saying that.
> 
> But, the wonderful ElectricMindArt told me he really likes both my drabbles and Guns and Roses (or UKShipping, whatever you want to call Caddy/Shane), so I wrote this for him, based on a few exchanges we had. Hope everyone enjoys it~!

As Caddy entered his boyfriend’s room, Shane smiled at him. Actually smiled. A few weeks ago, he’d have thought it a miracle, but now, Shane’s smiles, while precious, were fairly abundant. 

 

“You ready?”, Shane questioned, holding up a brightly colored movie box with a cover that looked like it could have been made in Paint. 

 

“Dog Cop?”, Caddy read. The hell is this shit?”

 

Shane chuckled. “It’s pretty awful, trust me.”

 

Ah, a bad movie night kind of guy, was he? Should have seen that coming. He’d had a few of those with the guys before, but, somehow it sounded infinitely more fun with Shane and a pile of blankets than Hidden Block and a pile of soft drinks. 

 

So, he sat down on the bed next to Shane and pulled a blanket around himself. “Well, let’s get this trainwreck rolling, shall we?”

 

Nodding, Shane opened his laptop and sat it precariously between the two of them, balancing on both their legs. 

 

Yeah, that wouldn’t end well “Sure about that setup?”, Caddy questioned. “It’ll be hard to move at all like that.”

 

Sighing, Shane shoved a few stray papers onto the floor and put it on the bedside table instead. “Better?”

 

“Well,” Caddy craned his neck to try and see the screen. It kind of hurt. “Now I can’t really see. Maybe we should sit on the floor?”

 

A shrug, and Shane fiddled with the laptop for a moment, turning the screen every variation of towards them, before sighing. “It’s too low. Maybe if we laid on our stomachs…”

 

For an hour and a half? That sounded less than pleasant. “Floor’s a better plan.”

 

“Or you could put your head in my lap,” Shane countered. “I could sit right in front of it, you might have to lay on a pillow or two, but it could work.”

 

Significantly more pleasant, probably the best idea they had. Sure, he’d be seeing it all sideways, but, it was Dog Cop, what would he be missing? “Yeah, sounds good.”

 

So Shane put a few pillows in his lap and Caddy laid down. He’d have loved to have said that they spent the entire movie riffing on it, like that show Ian liked so much. But, honestly, Caddy got a bit too comfortable. Between the blankets and the pillows and the fact it was just a tad bit too warm in the room, he was out like a light the second Shane started playing with his hair. 

 

He was woken up probably an hour and a half later, while credits rolled over the laptop screen. “Hey,” Shane almost whispered. “You’ve gotta go. It’s late, Jirard’ll be back any second.”

 

Probably the best idea, yes. Still, it was incredibly warm there, very cozy. “I don’t wanna,” he complained. 

 

“We have class in the morning, care to explain to anyone why you’re coming out of my dorm?”

 

Another very valid point that he did not care at all about. “Just five more minutes.”

 

“You’ll sleep another hour if I let you. Come on, you probably have homework, right?”

 

Did he look like he cared? No, because he didn’t. “Lemme stay, please?”

 

He wished Shane could see his puppy dog eyes, he’d been told they were quite effective. But, Shane just stood up, nearly knocking Caddy off the bed in the process. “Seriously, it’s late.”

 

Okay, fine. Caddy begrudgingly, over the course of at least five minutes, shook the blanket off and stood up. 

 

Sleepily, he tried to say something halfway charming. “Walk me to my dorm?”

 

Shane rolled his eyes. “Two doors down. I think you’ve got this.”

 

“Fine, fine…”, Caddy muttered. “Not even a-”

 

He was cut off by a quick peck on the cheek. A kiss goodbye, before he could even finish his complaint that he wasn’t being given one. He was in a daze from that all the way back to his dorm, where Jimmy was, as he’d been when Caddy left, sitting on the bed, playing his 4DS.

 

“So, how was your ‘secret meeting’?”, Jimmy questioned loudly, standing up and leaning awkwardly on the wall.

 

Oh, right. That was Caddy’s excuse. British Students Coalition meeting. He’d said that. “Er, good…”, he lied, trying to not meet Jimmy’s eyes.

 

His roommate smirked. “Ah, I see. Was the meeting in the supplies closet?”

 

It took Caddy a moment too long to realize what he meant, but when he did, blood shot to his cheeks. “N-n-no!”

 

Jimmy only smiled wider. “Sure, sure. But, if you’d rather have a meeting in here, I’d be glad to go have a meeting of my own.”

 

Oh great, convoluted innuendo. His favorite. Caddy rolled his eyes. “Who would you even have a ‘meeting’ with? Last I checked, your only boyfriends have been from dating sims and Skyfrost Valley!”

 

A laugh, Jimmy covered his mouth. “Oh, wow. I knew you were spacey, but, really? You haven’t noticed?”

 

“Noticed what?”, Caddy questioned. Jimmy responded by sitting back on his bed and reopening his 4DS. Caddy repeated his question, almost desperately. “Noticed what!?”


	17. [Jimmy and Wallid Clubswap AU] Distrust

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Got some AU prompt requests on Tumblr. This one was from the-artistic-mogeko for a WalJom Popular Kid and Nerd AU, but, I realized, that AU's basically any Normal Boots/Hidden Block AU in canon, at least in the eyes of the other students. So, I made it something of a clubswapping, switching a few of the members around in each club. So, in this AU, Jimmy, Ian, and Jeff would be in Normal Boots and Jirard, Shane, and PBG would be in Hidden Block. Didn't end up terribly shippy, but, hope you enjoy~!

Jimmy actually hadn’t had detention before, shockingly enough. He’d done plenty of things worse than passing notes, too, even ones he was sure he’d be seen doing by a teacher. He didn’t terribly mind- honestly, he hadn’t felt like going to the meeting that day anyways, and he certainly didn’t want to be around other people.

 

Which made the detention line-up pretty ideal, since there were only two other people in the room- the creepy nurse and the guy who’d gotten him into trouble in the first place. What was his name, Wallace? Something like that, but weird. 

 

Maybe, though, he ought to make an effort to remember it. Even if he had gotten him in trouble by passing him a note, he’d probably done it to be nice. Granted, Jimmy was mortified anyone at all noticed his small-scale mid-class mental breakdown, let alone a guy he barely knew. But, he’d asked him if he was alright in note form, and that was probably the nicest thing he’d gotten all day from anyone, even if it got him in freaking detention.

 

He wanted to thank Wal-whatever properly for that, but he didn’t want to run afoul that nurse, with his weird mask and eyes that were never visible, no matter where you looked. So, he just waited until the nurse stepped out for a moment, explaining a few students fell out of a tree and he’d be back shortly.

 

As soon as the door closed behind him, Jimmy started laughing. “Okay, that was definitely Continue who fell out of the tree. I’ll bet money on that.”

 

Wal-something laughed a small bit too. “I thought they were above falling out of trees like us peasants in different clubs!”

 

That stung a bit, hit a bit too close to home. But, Jimmy tried to laugh it off. “Oh no, they’ve fallen out of several. Also kicked a girl in the face more than once.”

 

“Really?” He seemed a bit surprised, but then laughed again. “Guess they’re humans after all!”

 

Without thinking, Jimmy drew in a shuddering breath. Did Wal know that was what he’d started wondering after joining, if he was seen as something more than human by all the pedestals the rest of the damn school put Normal Boots on? That knowing any wrong move would make him fall and shatter was driving him to the edge of tears frequently? 

 

If so, maybe he wasn’t as nice as he looked. They were “rivals”, after all- Wal was in that Hidden-whatsit club, judging by his jacket. He’d never dare take them seriously, but they would be competing in that tournament thing. Maybe this was trying to psyche him out.

 

No harm in asking and getting a pointless answer, right? “So, why’d you give that note to me, anyways?”

 

He shrugged. “You were about to cry, and I didn’t want to stand back and do nothing.”

 

Okay, he was playing at kindness. “Yeah, sure.”

 

“You don’t believe me, do you?”, he questioned, then sighing. “Well, don’t blame you. You have every reason to be suspicious after…”

 

Wal trailed off because anyone who’d paid a beat of attention at the school in the past few weeks would know what he meant. Rumors, most of them fake and malicious, but a few entirely too true, had been flying around about Normal Boots for the past few weeks. Plenty of them had been aimed at Jimmy himself, definitely not helping with his mental state.

 

“But, I swear, I wouldn’t try to hurt anyone, especially not someone who’s already hurting!”, Wal vowed. “It goes against my code as- as a good person!”

 

Could Jimmy trust that? He really wanted to. “Um, thanks… What was your name again?”

 

“Wallid,” he answered in a deadpan. “Look, I know from your high and mighty perch-”

 

“Don’t say things like that!”, Jimmy suddenly exclaimed. “Please… it’s um…”

 

Drawing in a sharp breath, Wallid slowly reached out towards him. “Oh my god, I’m so sorry. I didn’t realize, I thought you’d think it was funny…”

 

He offered his hand, and Jimmy let out a sigh that’d been building far too long. He could trust this guy, he thought, and took his hand. “I would usually…”

 

“I understand, don’t worry, I won’t tell a soul!”, Wallid assured him. “But, um… do you like being in Normal Boots otherwise?”

 

It took Jimmy a minute to think of a proper answer, which came in a shrug. “Used to. But, ever since that gossip shit, it’s been- well, I don’t hardly trust anyone, let alone them.”

 

Wallid gave him a worried frown. “You don’t think they’d try and protect you if anyone made fun of you, or keep your secrets?”

 

“I don't think anyone would fight for me, at least,” he admitted. He’d regret spilling his heart, he knew already, but, well, he kinda needed it off his chest. “Maybe keep my secrets, but I try not to give them this easily.”

 

His joke was laughed at, maybe a bit too much. “Well, I know at least one person who’d do both!”, Wallid offered. 

 

He really seemed committed to being a decent appearing person if he was lying. He couldn’t help but laugh, either way. “If you say it's you, I'll punch you.”

 

“Okay, then, uh…” Wallid stared off into space for a moment before nodding. “I don't know, Satch seems like he’d stick up for anyone!” 

 

Satch? He’d started out that way, but, after all that with Jared at the fashion show and Paul’s fit over that… “Not out loud, not anymore.”

 

This seemed to shock Wallid, or at least, he acted like it. “Alright, uh, that one guy, the really moody one?”

 

“Ian?”, Jimmy questioned. Wallid nodded. “Well, maybe. He does seem awfully happy to pick fights sometimes...”

 

“Oh right, he's the one who Caddy never shuts up about!”, Wallid exclaimed. “He seems nice enough.”

 

“Caddy?”, Jimmy repeated. “Who’s that?”

 

Despite expressing confusion over Jimmy’s confusion, Wallid seemed happy to explain. “He’s in our year, he’s a good friend of mine! He’s in our club!”

 

“Your club, Hidden Socks-”

 

“Hidden Block,” Wallid corrected. 

 

“Right. Um, what’s it like?”

 

A sudden smirk came over Wallid’s face. “You’re welcome to come to a meeting, we have one today!”

 

Was he being recruited? No, surely not… “We’re gonna miss it if you do,” Jimmy muttered. 

 

“Nope!”, Wallid enthusiastically assured him. “Told them about it, Jirard insisted we reschedule so no one would be left out!”

 

“Seriously?” What kind of weird friendship club was it, anyways?

 

“Come on, it’ll be fun!” Wallid was grinning up a storm, and Jimmy wanted to say yes, even if just to shut him up.

 

But, what if it was a trap? What if all of this was a trap, his mind wondered. 

  
Well, if it was a trap, he would fall hard, but he wanted to believe the world had this much good in it. “Alright. Just this one, though.”


	18. [PBG/Jon] Permission

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Note: I wrote this drabble BEFORE all the JonTron Shitstorm stuff. I in no way support him and I certainly don't at all ship this now. But, I think it'd be a waste to delete this, so it's staying up for the time being.

It was a lot harder to find a moment where Jon and Jacques weren't together than PBG had expected. Granted, he of all people should have known how much they were together, but he hadn't really counted the only opportunity him getting being while Jon was in the shower. 

 

So, he took a deep breath and forced himself to spit out the thing he’d been practicing in his head for a week.

 

“Jacques! I need to talk to you!”

 

The bird turned his head towards PBG. A pit formed in his stomach. He had to be strong. 

 

“Um, Jacques… so, er, how- how would you…”

 

It was hard to get the words out right. Jacques was starting to glare at him. Oh god, what if he said no? What if he told Jon about it and Jon laughed and his roommate started thinking he was a complete creep? Okay, that was unfair- Jon had known him this long without thinking he was a creep, so he surely wouldn’t start for something so small. 

 

“Spit it out,” Jacques ordered.

 

PBG took a deep breath. “Do I have your permission to ask Jon to go to the Flower Festival with me?”, he asked. See, that wasn’t so bad.

 

But Jacques stalled so long on the answer that his heart started to beat out of his chest. The bird’s eyes flashed red after a moment, and seemed to almost shrug. As much as a bird could shrug. “It depends.”

 

Depends? The word left ice to run down his back. “On what?”

 

“Why are you asking Jon?”, Jacques questioned. “Is it because you expect neither of you to get dates? I find it almost offensive you would sell him so short- there’s a week left until it, after all.”

 

“E-exactly!”, PBG stuttered out. “Someone else’ll ask him if I don’t soon!”

 

Was Jacques taking so long to answer him on purpose? If so, it definitely was getting to him. “You expect yourself not to get a date, then?”

 

Okay, maybe Jacques was just not understanding? “That’s why I’m asking Jon!”, he clarified. “I want to go with him!”

 

“Is it because you can’t get Hana?”

 

Ouch. Okay, Jacques could maybe tone it down a bit. But, PBG had thought about it, even with Hana there, he didn’t really want to go with her. It’d be awkward, with her not remembering him. But Jon, well, he wasn’t someone he would ever give up on. 

 

So, he took a deep breath and clarified his intent. “I really, truly, sincerely like Jon, not just because Hana doesn’t remember. I want to go to the Flower Festival with him because I want him to have a good time with me.”

 

He could have added something about how he really truly sincerely liked him in a non-platonic manner, but, he didn’t want Jacques to mention that if either he or Jon rejected him. 

 

“Well, I don’t see why not,” Jacques finally stated. “So long as you convince Jon to leave me behind unattended.”

 

That sounded… difficult, but, he was sure he could at least try, if that was his condition. “Thank you! I’ll take good care of him, I promise!”

 

“I do not doubt that,” Jacques muttered. 

 

PBG wanted to cheer loud enough for the whole school to hear him, but something stopped the shout before it left his lungs. Or rather, the door opening stopped him. There was Jon, changed into more casual clothes and with a towel wrapped around his head.

 

His heart hitched in his throat. He had to be casual, any declarations of intent could come later.

 

“Hey, um, real quick, wanted to ask you something,” PBG started, trying not to make eye contact. 

 

Jon cocked his head to the side, nearly throwing the towel off, but not saying a word. PBG went on. “Um, has anyone asked you to the Flower Festival?”

 

Though he was trying to avoid eye contact, he couldn’t help but look at Jon’s little smirk after he said that. “I don’t know, have they?”

 

“Yes,” PBG answered without thinking. After a moment of Jon staring at him, as if unsure if he meant what he thought he meant, he added “it’d be fun…”

 

A smile, and Jon winked. “Sounds good. But you have to walk me home.”

 

“But we- oh…” PBG laughed in a way that sounded too much like dazed giggling to not be silly. “Good one.”


	19. [Luke/Jared] Worth a Smile

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Felt like writing a thing, Tomate suggested I write some Luke/Jared, so I tried to make it as fluffy as possible. And failed.

“You know, I don’t deserve you,” Jared muttered under his breath as he sat next to Luke on his bed, watching some gameshow that just happened to be on. 

 

His boyfriend cocked his head to the side and raised an eyebrow. “What was that?”, he asked in a flat tone that indicated he heard exactly what he said. 

 

“I don’t deserve you,” Jared repeated. “You’re amazing, and I, well, I’m a complete-”

 

“Stop, yes you do,” Luke interrupted. “Come on, we can cuddle if you want.”

 

He wanted that. He pulled a bit closer and Luke wrapped an arm around him. All curled up like that, he felt safe and warm. Loved, even, that was new.

 

But, words echoed in his head. “You’ll never be worthy of love like that, you useless child!”

 

Mother had said that once, after he’d tripped while practicing some routine. He’d nearly cried, the tears burning like acid in his eyes, but he knew it’d only get worse if they spilled.

 

In hindsight, that wasn’t alright. That wasn’t okay in the slightest. Human beings shouldn’t say such things to other human beings. 

 

Even still, it echoed in his brain. He’d never be good enough for his family, for his friends, for anyone he actually wanted to date, and certainly not for himself. Any love he seeked felt out of reach, even if his boyfriend was holding him close and pressing the occasional kiss to the side of his head. 

 

His insides turned to jello with every kiss, and he could only think how very lucky he was to have tricked someone so wonderful into thinking he was worth his time. But, as he approached for another one, Luke stopped and pulled back. “What’s wrong?”

 

“Nothing!”, Jared hastily assured him. Okay, he was lying, but, he didn’t want to burden Luke any further.

 

That thought held. No, that was exactly what he needed to do. If he was going to tell anyone, it would be Luke. Worst he could do was push him away, like he felt he deserved. 

 

“Or, well, um…”

 

The words caught in his throat. What would he even say?

 

Luke seemed to slide behind him, derailing his train of thought. Light fingers ran down his arm, a kiss was pressed to his neck and sent a shiver down his spine. “Come on, tell me, Jar. Unless you’re cheating on me, I’ll gladly hear whatever it is you have to say.”

 

“I’m serious when I say I don’t feel like I deserve you,” he finally choked out. “I don’t feel like I deserve anything…”

 

Another kiss, this one on his cheek. “See, that wasn’t so bad, was it?”

 

Saying it? No, it wasn’t that bad. It felt nice to say that plainly, actually. “Well, no, but, you don’t-”

 

“Don’t what, think you’re an idiot?”, Luke questioned. “I mean, I get it. Trust me, I don’t feel like I’m good enough either. But, I make you smile, right?”

 

A smile spread on his face on cue. “Yeah…”

 

Luke laughed his wonderful, birdsong laugh. “So, I’m doing something right, aren’t I?”

 

“Do I make you smile, then?”, Jared questioned. 

 

Slipping back to his side, Luke stared at him for a moment, a huge smile fixed on his face. The kind of smile that made his heart soar and melt and dissolve into ash and be born anew.

  
So, he made someone happy. He was doing something right. That made him feel a bit better, at least. 


	20. [Jimmy/Wallid] Affectionate Insult

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Your daily reminder that I am trash. Or rather, an attempt at WalJom fluff. So your daily reminder that I'm WalJom trash specifically. I swear I'll write angst soon.

“Is it alright if I call you Princess?”, Wallid asked out of the blue.

Jimmy rolled his eyes and laid back on the table he was sitting on. “You already call me that. All the time, actually. Why ask now?”

A thoughtful hum came from Wallid. He gave a shrug. “Well, I mean, before I kinda meant it as an affectionate insult,” he clarified. “I was thinking it might be due to evolve into a pet name?”

“Affectionate insult,” Jimmy repeated that part, not the “pet name” part, that one was a bit too flirty to process all at once. “Is that what that was? I thought those were more like- dork, nerd, dweeb, loser…”

Some noise between a scoff and a laugh came from Wallid. “You mean your pet names for me?”

“Look, I’m shit at pet names,” Jimmy muttered, slowly pushing himself to sit up. “Gimme time, I could think of something better.”

Something of a giggle, Wallid climbed up on the table to join him. “I dare you, Princess.”

He said it different than usual, as his previous statement sort of implied. Not like he was trying to imitate an old Zilda cartoon, but like it meant something. Implied Jimmy was of equivalent worth to royalty in his eyes. A hot flash crept up the back of his neck in response.

Right, he was trying to think of something. Well, if Princess Pear was his thing, what was Wallid’s?

A single thought came in his mind- the cute, lace-ridden dress Wallid would put on and fight crime or whatever. “I dunno,” Jimmy mused with a mocking chuckle. “Usagi? Sakura? Hikaru? Madoka?”

Wallid looked away, as if trying to hide a blush. “No one else would really get that, Jim…”

“So?”, he countered. “It’s not like anyone gets Princess.”

“True… But, well, just a more general word would work, if one existed.”

Chuckling, one popped in his mind. “Witch?”

“I’m not that kind of Magical Girl!”, Wallid insisted, turning a bright red, waving his hands in front of him. “I didn’t made a contract with any suspicious creatures!”

That blush was absolutely adorable, really. “I trust you, Wal,” Jimmy assured him in the most sultry voice he could manage. A tough transition, but Wallid seemed to go with it.

Could he stick the landing, then? Jimmy leaned forward a bit, putting a hand under Wallid’s chin. “I trust you with my heart, after all.

After that, Wallid could put strawberries to shame with his coloration. He leaned forward as well, rather far given they were sitting a fair bit apart.

And, just as their lips were set to meet, Jimmy pulled away with a chuckle. Wallid ended up falling nearly into his lap from momentum.

“Come on, that was mean!”, Wallid complained.

Okay, maybe just a little. He pulled Wallid the rest of the way into his lap and planted a kiss on his forehead. “Well, even if I suck at cute nicknames, I excel at flirting.”

“That wasn’t flirting!” Wallid was looking up at him and pouting.

“What would you call that, then?”, Jimmy questioned.

It took a moment for Wallid to answer, in which he couldn't help but notice how strangely nice it was to be so close, despite the fact they were barely in anything resembling a comfortable position. Wallid was practically laying on his stomach, Jimmy had one arm wrapped around him and another behind him, and it would probably get uncomfortable if they stayed that way much longer.

But then, a mischievous smirk, one that would make anyone shudder, and Wallid sat up quickly to plant a quick peck on his lips. It was sweet and lingered just a second long enough to be warm.

And, a second after pulling away, while Jimmy was still in a daze, a huge grin spread across Wallid’s face “I’d call it chickening out,” he practically whispered 


	21. [Jirard/Ian] Covert Cuddler

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello yes electricmindart is at fault for this wonderful idea again. So, have some super duper fluffy Jirard/Ian stuff.

Ian’s eyes kept nearly closing, Jirard noted. Would he be alright with going to sleep? Surely he was close enough to done with that assignment, and he had tomorrow to work on it as well, so he could just be proud of what he’d done and sleep, right?

“You look tired,” he remarked, trying to transition into that suggestion.

Shrugging, Ian put his pencil down. “I g-guess…” Yep, he was fighting to keep his eyes open. “But, I can keep going. I’ll just close my eyes for a minute.”

Would that really work? He wasn’t sure, but then again, if it worked for Ian, that was great. Plus, he might end up falling asleep in the chair, next to him, and as creepy as he felt for thinking it, Ian was kind of cute when he was sleeping.

Sure enough, Ian quickly fell back in the chair and closed his eyes, his breath starting to slow. And yep, pretty cute, Jirard felt like a bit of a stalker watching him like he was. Maybe just turn away? Yeah, that was for the best, even if he looked really calm and happy and- no, just turn away…

But, as he did so, he found Ian pulling him closer, practically nuzzling into his arm. He was confused, Ian had made it perfectly clear he liked him, but never been particularly affectionate. Him slowly putting an arm around him and falling on top of him was odd. A strange feeling, but a very much welcome one.

He was happy to be Ian’s pillow, even if he was probably doing all this while barely or even fully asleep. After a moment, Ian ended up basically in his lap, definitely completely asleep but at least seemingly comfortable.

Jirard considered taking his jacket off and draping it over Ian to keep him warmer, but couldn't think of a way to do it without waking him up. So, instead, he tried not to dwell too much on Ian’s sleepy smile and instead stroked his head, fingers slowly trailing through his hair, in hopes maybe he'd be more comfortable.

Maybe it was wishful thinking, but he was sure Ian’s smile grew wider as he did so.

Unfortunately, as nice as it was, Ian woke up after what felt like far too short a time and quickly sat up, as if trying to deny he'd done anything. He got back to working once again, even if he still seemed a bit sleepy.

After a little while, he figured maybe he could offer his services as a pillow again, as Ian was definitely working slower than he had been earlier.

“Hey, you know, you've done really well, but if you wanted to keep cuddling up to me-”

He stopped himself as Ian turned away and hid his face. “K-keep? I didn't… I thought I was dreaming…”

Jirard couldn't help but chuckle. “It's alright! I liked it! If you like that, you know, we could totally cuddle more often!”

Ian buried his face in his hands for a moment before letting out a sigh. “Okay, fine but, d-don't mention it to anyone! God, the guys would never let me hear the end of it…”

“I'm sure they wouldn't care!”, Jirard quickly assured him. “They're your friends! What would they care if you have a mushy center!”

Before he could react, he found Ian back leaning on his shoulder again, smiling slightly. “Either way, you're really comfortable…”

 


	22. [Luke -> Ian -> Shane] Midnight Chat

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Combination of a sentence prompt I found and a suggestion from Tomate to write a Shane/Ian. Enjoy!

It was rare someone would call Luke in the middle of the night. Even rarer when that person would be Ian. Rare as in unprecedented. Rare as in it was the last thing in the world he expected to be woken up by. Not unwelcome, just new.

But, it was Ian, he couldn't help but offer his voice. He carefully snuck out of his room and into the bathroom to take the call without waking his roommate up.

“Hey, what’s up?”, he questioned.

A strange noise came from one of the stalls, and then again from the speaker. “Looks like we thought of the same quiet spot. Hang up.”

Luke did so, and saw one of the stalls opening in the mirror. Ian came out, his eyes strangely red, as if he'd been crying. “Hey. So, um… yeah…”

He didn't seem sure of what to say, so Luke turned around to face him properly and offered a kind smile. “Take your time. Tell me who I need to punch.”

Shaking his head, Ian jumped up to sit on the counter beside him- a gesture he more than welcomed. “Me, maybe. I'm being stupid.”

About what? Self-loathing? Schoolwork? General discontent? Not noticing things that should have been perfectly obvious? “Explain.”

“Shane Gill,” was all Ian said.

Unhelpful. “So I need to punch him?”

“No, you need to punch me so I'll stop thinking about him,” Ian corrected. “He's…” he let out a sigh. “He’s probably not interested.”

Oh, that was what Ian was thinking about? Crying in the bathroom at one in the morning because he had a crush on Known Asshole Shane Gill. That hurt, but, it seemed pretty expected. How very… Ian of him.

Completely unpredictable, Ian was. Could be cursing the existence of forks one minute and selflessly helping some kid he'd never met the next, it was what made him so wonderful. This didn't seem strange at all for Ian, all things considered.

“Ah, coming to your buddy Luke with your love problems, are you?”, he questioned, and Ian quickly buried his face in his hands.

“No,” Ian muttered “Can’t you just tell me I'm being stupid and some lame crush isn't worth getting worked up over!”

Luke couldn't help but laugh. He put a hand on Ian’s shoulder, hoping it would help. “Look, if love was easy, we’d be writing songs about better things. Like pizza.”

Ian uncovered his face and gave a resolute nod. “So you're saying I should redirect this energy into more worthwhile endeavors, got it.”

“No, no,” Luke corrected. “I'm not saying it's not worth all the effort. It can be nice, but only sometimes. I'm saying you've gotta decide yourself if Shane Gill is worth crying in the bathroom in the middle of the night over.”

An awkward silence, broken by a strange laugh from Ian. “That's not- that's not an answer.”

Oh, he wanted to know what to do? Not just be reassured? Well, maybe he could help there too. “Tell me, then. Why do you like him?”

Ian closed his eyes for a moment before opening them and cocking his head to the side. “He's kind of nice when you get to know him. He loves plants and is really proud of the flower garden on the roof. He’s pretty funny. He's an incredible artist. He makes me feel like he gives a damn about me.”

“Seems… he’s pretty important to you,” Luke mused. “I say go for it.”

“Wait, what?”

That hadn't been the response Ian wanted, yeah, but it was what he needed to hear. “You won't get this out of your head until either you get your heart broken or end up pleasantly surprised,” he explained.

“You're saying I should confess?,” Ian questioned, almost in disbelief.

Luke shrugged. “Worst case scenario, he says no, you eat some ice cream and watch murder mysteries, and you both go back to normal in a week. Best case scenario, he likes you back and you're super happy together. Never know until you try.”

“I mean, maybe, but,” Ian shook his head. “I'm not trying this late, though.”

Nodding, Luke started towards the bathroom door. “Yeah, see how you feel about it tomorrow.”

He held the door open, and while Ian rolled his eyes, he went out nonetheless. “Night, Luke.”

“Night,” he repeated, watching Ian go down the hall.

It was almost hard to watch him leave, and he half hated himself for what he'd said. He knew Shane wouldn't say return those feelings, he was too hung up on that Emily girl.

Was it cruel, to hope Ian would get his heart broken so he could mend it? 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'd like to call this one: Luke is sort of a terrible person and friend.


	23. [Shane/Caddy] Frostbite

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another Tumblr prompt- an I Love You said "Too quick, mumbled into your scarf"

“It’s cold, isn’t it?” Caddy grabbed his hand, running his thumb over it repeatedly, like that little friction could warm it. 

 

Shane shook his head and gave a small laugh, the air coming out in a little cloud that did nothing for his claims of warmth. “I’ve seen worse,” he assured his boyfriend. 

 

“Of course, I have too, but it’s still pretty damn cold.” Caddy tugged on the scarf he was wearing, adjusting it and pulling it over the lower half of his face. “Sure you don’t want to go inside?”

 

Part of him did, but it was so nice to be out there alone, just the two of them. He squeezed Caddy’s hand. “Nah, unless you want to.”

 

Caddy huffed. “Not really, I just don’t want you to freeze. Seriously, you’re still only wearing your club jacket?”

 

Rolling his eyes, Shane pointed at his scarf. “Oh, and that keeps you warm enough?”

 

“As it so happens,” Caddy adjusted the scarf again, pulling it back down so it wasn’t covering his mouth. “It quite does.”

 

How? No really, it was just an ordinary scarf, aside from it being an eye-bleed inducing shade of yellow. It was barely different than not wearing anything more than a jacket. “Do you just not get cold?”, he mused. “Or…”

 

A smirk, like Caddy suddenly had an idea. “If you don’t believe me about it being warm, here.” 

 

Caddy started to take the scarf off, but Shane shook his head and grabbed his wrist, slowly pulling it back onto his neck. 

 

“I’d rather you not worry,” Shane muttered. “I’m fine.”

 

“Aw, Shaney doesn’t want me to get cold?”, Caddy cooed. “How very sweet.”

 

It seemed to get rather less cold all of a sudden. Especially around his face and the back of his neck. “Sh-shut up…”, he huffed. 

 

Before he could react, he felt arms close around him and pull him close. “Aw, come here.”

 

Shane buried his face in Caddy’s scarf. It was, in fact, rather warm. As was the hug. Really, everything felt warm, even his insides.

 

“Love you.” He said it as if he were racing to get all the words out before losing the nerve. It was all but whispered into the scarf, half-hoping he wouldn't be heard.

  
But, he knew Caddy heard him. His reply was wordless, just a quick kiss to his temple.


	24. [PBG/Jimmy] Playing it Cool

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wrote this for electricmindart because he IS A GREAT DORK WHO SHOULD JUST LET ME WRITE STUFF FOR HIM. So, have some Salted Pretzel.

Okay, okay, how did kissing someone work? PBG, shameful to say, hadn't actually done it before- he'd been holding out for Hana until realizing that wasn't going to happen, so he hadn't really had a chance. And then he started holding out for Jimmy, and, well…

“Why are you staring at me like that?”, his boyfriend questioned, looking up from his 4DS.

Darn, Jimmy was really cute and it was hard not to stare but he couldn't just stare and not do anything! Okay, just play it cool, he begged himself.

“Um, just… um…”, he stuttered our, definitely not playing it cool in the slightest.

Jimmy cocked his head to the side, and wow did PBG want to kiss him but he still had no idea how! Just lean in? Should he ask first? Or was it better to surprise him?

Yeah, surprise him. As Jimmy gave up and went back to his game, he started to lean in.

But, Jimmy suddenly moved and gave him a weird look. “What the hell are you doing?”

Okay, surprising was a bad idea. Might as well be honest. “I wanted to kiss you?”

The shade of red his boyfriend turned made his stomach do flips. “You… do?”

PBG nodded, and Jimmy slowly smiled. “Well, I think that c-could be arranged…”

Taking a deep breath, Jimmy suddenly leaned forward and planted a kiss on his lips. It was kind of nice. A little strange, kind of warm, softer than he'd imagined.

They broke away after a minute and Jimmy started laughing. “I didn't do that right,” he admitted. “That's not at all how you're supposed to do it, right?”

“I have no idea!”, PBG exclaimed. “But you did fine!”

Jimmy hid his face behind his 4DS a bit, but he knew without looking he was blushing and grinning. “You weren't bad yourself.”

 


	25. [Jared/Satch] Love Memory

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Valentine's Day! I wrote some ProSatch trash because I am trash. However, Japanese schools aren't in session during February, so it kind of had to be an un-Valentine's Day in universe or it would bother me. Because Magical Girls and sparkling models and pink hair are realistic enough but changing the school months of a Japanese high school is going too far.

All Jared could do was stare at the flowers falling out of his locker. He hadn’t put any of them in there, no one knew his locker combination, to his knowledge, and honestly he wasn’t entirely certain he hadn’t done this himself because this was entirely the kind of thing he would do. 

 

“Jared, are you trying to seduce yourself?”, Paul dryly questioned as he walked by. 

 

Yep, even Paul agreed. Had Jared-of-the-future time travelled to put flowers in his locker for no reason? Was his future truly so bleak that he was still the only person who would show him kindness?

 

“I… don’t know, maybe?”

 

He picked up a few of the fallen flowers. His mother had made him memorize all their meanings- one of the few lessons he was truly grateful for. Bright red tsubaki flowers. Frilly pink carnations that looked nearly like his family’s namesake. Pure white gardenias. Bright yellow sunflowers. A few stray forget-me-nots, like tiny blue stars in the sea of color. And of course, bloody red roses.

 

All together, the meaning felt redundant. This person loved him, loved him, loved him, loved him, and seemed to not know how flower language worked. 

 

But, who could it be? A thousand people seemed to look at him, but no one who would go quite this… overboard. And if there was a card or a note, it was buried so deep in petals it wouldn’t be seen for another month or three. 

 

So, who could it be?

 

A slight chuckle from Paul. “Turn around,” he requested.

 

As much as Jared hated ever listening to Mister Student Council President, he did so, and found himself facing Satch. Beautiful, perfect Satch. Smiling and holding a box of chocolates out to him. 

 

“This all seems very… Valentine's…”, Jared muttered. “But that’s not for months, sadly.”

 

Satch shook his head. “No, but… you told me something once, you know?”

 

“That I love Valentine's Day?”

 

“Well, that, and…” Satch took a step closer. “I asked you once what the happiest day of your life was. You said it was Valentine’s Day at the dance academy you went to as a kid. You expected nothing, but everyone in the class gave you candy and cards.”

 

Oh, right. The first time he’d felt truly loved. Many happier days had come since then, but it was still a fond memory. “So you’re showering me with love to try and recreate that feeling?”

 

“I’m showering you in love because I love you,” Satch corrected. “And because I want you to feel loved.”

 

A grin spread across Jared’s face. A love confession, from the one person he trusted to love him for all of his flaws? He had to be dreaming. 

  
He stepped closer, taking the chocolates from Satch so he could hold his hand. “I love you too, Satch. More than I could ever say.”


	26. [Caddy/Ian] Hate Date

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is Jasper's fault. Again. I know it's been written before but- Caddy asking Ian to the flower festival like the Tsundere he is.

He found Ian under the damn tree. Why did he like that specific tree, anyways? What was so special about that tree? Was it more comfortable than other trees? And why would anyone just… chill under a tree anyways?

 

Ian looked up as he approached and rolled his eyes. “What’s it this time?”, he groaned. 

 

A deep breath. Caddy had been rehearsing this moment in his head. Nice and simple, nice and straightforward. “Let’s go to the Flower Festival.”

 

His rival seemed confused. “Huh?”

 

Oh, right. Oops. “Together. Let’s go together.”

 

It took a moment for Ian to stop staring at him like he had two heads or something. Then, he frowned. “You… realize I hate you, right?”, he questioned. 

 

“Exactly!” God, had Ian thought he was asking him out or something? Pathetic, just like his Moosey. Who was not at all his, judging by the pang of hurt in his chest. 

 

Still, Moosey was confused. “Exactly what?”

 

Seems he required some explanation of what was in no way his backup plan. “There are games at the Flower Festival!”, he exclaimed “Like, fun fair ones! And I want to beat you at all of them!”

 

“Oh. So it’s a Hate Date?” Ian gave a strange smirk. “Well, not like any other guys are gonna ask me.”

 

“You better not be settling for me, Moosey!”, Caddy shrieked. “If it’s just a pity Hate Date, I don’t want it.”

 

Shrugging, Ian got to his feet. It was a bit harder to make eye contact with him that way. “Eh, nah, it sounds fun,” he admitted. “We should go.”

 

A smile shot up on Caddy’s face, despite his best efforts. He wasn’t happy, just pleased. Only pleased. “Wonderful! You’ll pick me up at eighteen-hundred!”

 

“Oh, I’m picking you up?” Ian rolled his eyes. “Please, you’ll meet me there.”

 

“No, you have to be a gentleman and escort me!”, Caddy huffed. The nerve of some people, not understanding date- no, Hate Date ettiquite. 

 

Ian scoffed. “If you’re gonna be so proper about it, you escort me!”

 

“Fine!”, Caddy shouted. “I’ll be there at six! Be ready and I’ll destroy you at every game at the Festival!”

 

“Sounds like a date.” Ian winked as he said it and just walked off. The nerve of that bastard! Not like Caddy even wanted to go on a date with him or anything!

  
But, his cheeks were hot, he noticed as Ian got further and further away. Strange.


	27. [Hidden Block Bakery AU] Salt and Pepper

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Jasper and I made a Bakery AU. And several terrible jokes involving it. This is a combination of all those things.

For once, Ian was actually grateful he watched some of the videos Jeff sent him, because once What’s New Pussycat played twice in a row, he recognized the joke with a groan. “Luke,” he shot a glare at the designated audio guy. “I thought I told you about letting Wallid have the audio jack.”

 

“I didn’t,” Luke assured him, darting past him while carrying a tray of pretzels. “Wallid’s not been near it all day.” He gave a bitter laugh. “You think I’m that stupid? Wednesdays only, we agreed.”

 

“Okay, then why is ‘What’s New Pussycat’ playing again?”

 

“Is that a meme? Maybe it’s just kind of long?”, Luke suggested. “I didn’t notice it restart.”

 

“You… don’t know that meme,” Ian deadpanned. 

 

“Why would it be a meme?”

 

The end of the song was approaching. “Wait for it,” Ian prompted. 

 

Luke stopped to listen for a moment. The song played once again. Of freaking course it did. They were being memed. His coworker let out a small groan as well. 

 

Ian kept count in his head as he checked somewhat confused customers out. Three times, four times, five… When it came to six, he stopped Luke while he was running to the storage closet. 

 

“If after the next one ‘It’s Not Unusual’ plays, we’re being memed,” he informed Luke. 

 

Yeah, Luke still looked confused. No one explained the joke to him. “Is meme a verb?”, Luke questioned. 

 

Was it technically, no. But, did Wallid’s insistence to play the soundtrack to Shrek every Wednesday make him feel like it should be? Oh lord, should it be. 

 

So, dryly, he explained. “The little shits we call our coworkers make it one.”

 

A smirk from Luke. “Alright, let’s see.”

 

Of course, after the seventh play, It’s Not Unusual started playing, and frankly, Ian wanted to rip the speakers out of the walls. A sigh of relief came through the shop, but a wild giggle rose up from Wallid and Jimmy, who seemed to be rather cozied up to each other as they worked. As always. Those two just couldn’t stay off each other, could they?

 

Even in the middle of what was undoubtedly their doing. Or Caddy’s. It was usually Caddy’s fault. It was sickening.

 

On cue, the entire shop groaned when What’s New Pussycat started back up. But, Ian refused to take anymore of this bullshit. He unplugged the MP3 player from the speaker system and quiet filled the air, as well as a relieved sigh. 

 

“Moosey, why didn’t you let us at least get to ten?,” Caddy huffed.

 

“Us?” Ian felt a smirk growing. “Oh, so you did do this.”

 

Jimmy piped up, gladly incriminating himself. “Yeah, we thought it’d be funny.”

 

“It wasn’t,” Jeff assured them.

 

A small laugh from Wallid. “It really was, I’m proud of you guys.”

 

Proud? That song would be stuck in his head for the next month, what was there to be proud of? And it wasn’t even an original joke! “Seriously, couldn’t you have at least annoyed us more creatively?”

 

“It’s better than ten hours of Cooking by the Book, right?”, Jimmy offered. 

 

“Nothing is better than ten hours of Cooking by the Book!”, Luke exclaimed. 

 

“Luke I will actually lock you in the storage closet if you do that again,” Ian muttered under his breath. 

 

Caddy and Jimmy were still chuckling at each other. Too happy about what they’d done. Well, all sinners had to repent, right? 

 

“Jimmy, go get more flour. Jim, go help him,” Ian ordered, and both shot him weird looks.

 

“But… we’re fine on flour,” Jimmy muttered, while Caddy just glared. 

 

“Moosey’s just gonna lock us in the closet,” Caddy explained. “So, no, get your own damn flour.”

 

Ian did not get his own damn flour. In fact, he didn’t get any flour when it was needed for days afterwards because those little shits would have surely locked him in there.


	28. [Open Your Eyes AU PBG/Luke] Apocrypha

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, Open Your Eyes is the best song ever and I made an AU about it (credit in part to gooey-and-chewy and sunnysidejeff for also writing things about it). 
> 
> Also Jasper wanted PBG/Luke so I combined the two things. Sort of. It's light on the shipping. 
> 
> More info here: http://twilightjoltik-toumei.tumblr.com/post/157712904436/other-idea-for-an-open-your-eyes-based-asagao-au

“Open your eyes…”

 

The words resonated across the room, into PBG’s very bones. His eyes forced themselves open, and all of a sudden, his body felt like it was melting, like something was quickly falling away from it. 

 

A small noise escaped his throat as he sat up. Where… was he? It didn’t look like anywhere in the palace, and he certainly didn’t remember leaving it. Or much at all, really. What had he been doing before getting here?

 

Blood rushed to his head and the blue glow of the place started to give him a headache. This… wasn’t familiar at all, honestly.

 

He heard another voice, muttering something under its breath. Looking around, he saw a familiar silhouette, one that made his blood boil a bit.

 

“Y-you!”, he called across the room. “You kidnapped me!”

 

The figure looked confused before finally meeting his eyes. Luke, prince of the neighboring kingdom, a nice person before things had all gone to shit but currently the thing in this world most likely to kill him. Since their countries had gone to war, Luke had ended up more than a bit terrifying.

 

And now they were in a room together, far away from home, with no one probably able to hear PBG’s screams. 

 

But, as Luke let out a series of confused noises, his abject terror turned to confusion. Why was Luke asleep too, anyways?

 

“I… you didn’t… bring me here?”, Luke questioned groggily. 

 

“No!”, PBG yelled across the room, to the other glowing pod/bed thing. “Why would I do that?”

 

A dry laugh. “To kill me?”

 

“No, I thought you were gonna kill me!”, PBG yelled back.

 

They both gave scattered chuckles before Luke sighed loudly. “Well, we’re still here. Maybe someone wants us both dead?”

 

Scanning the room, PBG noticed a door- heavy and stone. Could they leave?

 

Shakily, he got to his feet, and waved to the other prince. “L-let’s go look and see about that door!”

 

Luke followed the motion and stumbled towards the door. And, as the two of them went to it, it started to open on its own, letting blinding sunlight into the room.

 

As his eyes adjusted, his heart caught in his throat. It looked as if a fire had run through the field. Broken rocks were scattered everywhere. 

 

“What… where are we?”, he questioned, as Luke made a strange noise.

 

“This was… no…”, Luke practically whispered. “This can’t be…”

 

He seemed to wobble a bit, so PBG grabbed his hand to steady him. “Whatever this is, let’s agree to find out together, alright?”

  
Luke gave a shaky nod, and they walked into the wasteland together.


	29. [PBG/Jeff] Move Along

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Full credit for the idea for this one to androo-the-moose, who gave me permission to use their Spacebutter prompt. I couldn't resist. 
> 
> It's here if you wanna see the original: https://androo-the-moose.tumblr.com/post/157755884284/oh-goshhhhhhhhh-imagine-pbg-being-heartbroken-and

Hana and Jirard were perfectly happy together. Hana was smiling like he hadn’t seen her in years. Together, those two were absolutely radiant.

 

PBG knew he should have been happy for his friends. They would have been happy for him if he’d found someone who made him that incredibly happy.

 

So why was he crying and curled up on his bed? Good question. Well, one with an obvious answer: he’d loved Hana for years. Several of them, actually. Possibly more than ten. He wasn't entirely certain of the exact timeline there.

 

But what did it matter, he'd lost. She was happy, happier than he'd ever made her. He could have had a chance, but he'd blown it.

 

If only he'd been braver, if only he'd said something sooner, if only he'd been more decisive, if only he was the kind of person who could make her happy, if only, if only, if only-

 

“Hey, you in here?”

 

A voice snapped him out of his misery. Jeff’s voice- of course it was Jeff, it always was. He’d cracked the door open and rapped on the doorframe.

 

Turning to face his friend, he gave a watery smile. “Y-yeah! I’m here!”

 

“You okay?”, Jeff questioned, coming closer.

 

PBG tried to say he was fine, but was cut off by a frown from Jeff as he looked at his face. “You’ve been crying…”, he muttered.

 

“I-”

 

He couldn’t get anything more out before Jeff sat down next to him and put his arms around him. “Stop. You aren’t fine. Don’t say you are.”

 

“Okay, I’m not,” he muttered into Jeff’s shoulder. “I… will be, I’m happy for them, but…”

 

Jeff wiped a forming tear from his eye. “I know, you liked her for a long time.”

 

A sob came up from his throat. “Y-yeah…”

 

Soft shushing noises, and Jeff pulled him closer. “It’s okay, Peebs. You’re okay,” he assured him softly. “It hurts, but, you aren’t alone.”

 

Sniffling, he tried to push his words through the tears. And, with the hands tracing shapes on his back and the words making his mind relax, there were only a few he could say. “I know… I have you…”

 

With a strange sort of laugh, Jeff made a small “mm-hm” noise before sighing. “You sure do.”

 

For a moment, Jeff pulled away, and before he could register what was happening, he felt a light kiss brush against his cheek. “And, who needs her when you’ve got me?”

 

Though Jeff laughed as he said it, he looked almost sad as well. Like it was something he was scared to hear a responce to.

 

But, in Jeff’s arms like that, PBG had a bit of a strange thought. “Yeah, who needs Hana? It’d be more fun just to like you!”

 

He tried to make it sound like a joke, just in case, but Jeff let out a strange noise. “You… I mean… do… you?”

 

As if to nudge him towards an answer, Jeff wrapped him up a bit tighter in the hug. It was nice, made him feel safe.

 

That was how he felt at that moment, though. Jeff was important to him, he needed to take a step back before doing something stupid he couldn’t take back. “I’ll get back to you on that.”

  
“Take your time, Peebs.” Jeff pressed a chaste kiss to his forehead. “Take your time.”


	30. [Shane/Ian] Digcraft

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Loosely based on an old Hidden Block stream I found, but really just Ian and Shane flirting while playing not-Minecraft. Thanks to Jasper for the idea, again.

Why had Hidden Block invited him to play Digcraft again? Was it because Caddy was busy and they needed a Designated Brit to keep them in line? Okay no, that was stupid, really stupid. Not even they were that stupid. 

 

Maybe it was more that no one else would. They’d probably asked a few other people first. Jared, Satch, PBG, hell, even Jirard was closer to them. He was their last choice, right?

 

Of course, he started to doubt this assessment after Ian started pretty much following him around and killing any monster that came within five feet of him. 

 

“I saved your life,” Ian would assure him as he slayed a zombie that hadn’t even touched him. 

 

Shane rolled his eyes. “Yes, my hero.”

 

And then Ian started putting flowers around where he walked. Like, how was he getting that many flowers? And why were they all being thrown at him?

 

He laughed as Ian placed a poppy at his feet. “What are you doing?”, he asked over the voice chat. 

 

His phone buzzed, a single word from Jimmy: “flirting”.

 

Oh. Oh, okay. Ian had invited him to flirt. Well, two could play at that game. 

 

Next time a monster approached them, he ran his sword through it before Ian could react. 

 

“Saved your life,” he half-chuckled.

 

He could almost hear Ian smirking. “My hero.”

 

The game became a lot more fun from there out.

 

“Oh, my brave knight!”, Ian melodramatically cried. “Won’t you rescue me from these wretched beasts?”

 

Jimmy huffed. “Oi, that’s my bit!”

 

“Yeah, Jimmy’s the wimp!”, Luke added with a laugh. 

 

“Princess,” he corrected with a snarl. 

 

Shane just smiled and shot an arrow in the Reeper’s head. “Anything for you, my liege.”

 

Wallid groaned. “God, get a room, you two!”

 

“But we’re in a field,” Ian dryly countered. 

 

An ominous laugh came from… someone, Shane couldn’t tell who. He guessed Jimmy, as a moment later, he muttered “check your phone, Wallid”, and Wallid stopped making pointless dirt towers momentarily. 

 

Another ominous laugh, but Shane elected to ignore it in favor of the tulip Ian set out in front of him. 

 

“Is this lovely flower for me?”, he said in a voice imitating Ian’s earlier. 

 

“Who else would it have been for?” Ian gave a little laugh and set another poppy out. “Only the most lovely flowers for you, milord.”

 

Shane put one of the flowers from earlier in front of Ian. “I thought you were my liege.”

 

Another tulip in front of him. “Well, you’re the more regal of us.” 

 

“You’re more noble.”

 

“Oh, I’ll show you noble alright…”

 

A gagging noise, and Shane suddenly noticed there were dirt walls forming around them. He rolled his eyes. “Jimmy, why?”

 

“We told you to get a room,” Wallid explained. 

 

Jimmy gave a little laugh. “But you didn’t, so we made you one!”

 

The walls finished forming, and Shane let out a sigh. “Whatever, we’ll just-”

 

“Be right back!”, Ian suddenly exclaimed. 

 

Shane fell back in his seat with a sigh. “Only fun part of the game, gone…”

 

He took his headphones off- he didn’t want to hear the others going on. Hell, he didn’t even want to talk to them. Just Ian, really. 

 

The door to his dorm creaked open, was Jirard back already? He didn’t bother to turn around until he felt a pair of arms closing around him. 

 

“I’m back,” Ian murmured. “You miss me?”

  
Flirting in real life made Shane a bit more nervous than in-game, but Ian’s arms around him felt strangely safe. “Of course,” he muttered back, quickly closing out of the game.


	31. [Jared/PBG] Exhaustion

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Friendly reminder these are drabbles and I decided this would be where anything under 800 words for Asagao would go. So they can be hella short. Like this. 
> 
> Anyways, another Tumblr prompt from my friend who really shouldn't have any idea what Sparklingsalt even is because he's never even touched Asagao besides from what I've told him. Also featuring ianasagao's Trans!Jared headcanons because they're amazing and I had to use them at some point.

“I’m so… so tired of you!”, Jared almost shouted. He would have said it louder, but there were other people in the dorms. 

 

PBG nodded. “Okay, be more specific. Pretend I’m her!”

 

Okay ew… no. His boyfriend probably noticed the grossed out expression on his face and backpedaled. “Er, pretend this pillow is her!” He held up one of the pillows from the top bunk. 

 

He tried to picture his mother’s face instead of the pillow. It made his blood boil over a bit, even just with the thought. 

 

“So tired of everything… I’m tired of feeling sick to my stomach every time I make a mistake!”

 

His boyfriend smiled and motioned him to go on. 

 

The words came out a lot easier. “You’re always like ‘if you want a hobby, it has to be a sophisticated, advantageous hobby’ and ‘if you want to be a boy, you have to be a flawless boy’, and… I can’t always be what you want! I’m who I am, I’m a dork who likes playing video games and Dungeons and Dragons with his friends! I mess up sometimes, sometimes pretty badly, and I hate having to feel like I never should have been born every time it happens!”

 

“Is that really how she makes you feel?”, PBG interjected with a frown. “Why didn’t you-”

 

“I-it’s not important,” Jared sighed. 

 

A shake of the head, and PBG put a hand on his shoulder. “If it’s really that bad, you should like, tell someone! All of us are here for you, not just me!”

 

He shrugged. “I tell Satch when it’s getting bad, usually. He tries to help.”

 

PBG frowned strangely. “S-Satch, of course… He’s amazing…”

 

And there he went again. “Stop it with that self-deprecating shit,” Jared huffed. “You’re amazing, and the only reason I hadn’t come to you is because it hasn’t been as bad lately!”

 

“It hasn’t?” PBG perked right back up. “That’s great!”

 

“I’ve felt more confident in myself, enough to ask you out and mention the roleplaying stuff to you guys,” Jared continued. “If I could just get Her off my back, I might actually be able to get my shit together for once.”

 

“Well, let’s keep working on it!”, PBG exclaimed. “Wanna practice again?”

 

To be fair, practicing what he would say to her in an ideal situation was rather cathartic. So he nodded and cleared his throat again. “I’m tired of all this! I’m tired of you, mother!”


	32. [Voidtrip/Televoid Caddimoose] Oyasumi, Oyasumi

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is dedicated to Jasper, my bestest friend, and his awesome-ass Voidtrip AU. Ft. Televoid!Ian because A, that's the point of this AU, that Caddy and Ian are in the same boat, and B, I have A Lot Of Feelings about Televoid. So, enjoy!

There’s a fantasy Caddy holds dear, one he returns to time and time again.

 

When stumbling through a Trip, when Ian’s breathing shallowly and draining of color, when he’s lonely and wants to go home, he thinks of it. 

 

It’s the same image every time. He’s sitting on the couch at his home- not the black one in the endless abyss he’s made a temporary home. 

 

But, Ian’s there beside him, his face full of color, his cheeks no longer sunken in, his eyes not ringed with shadow but full of light. He’s smiling contently, curled up next to him. 

 

It’s harder to imagine himself, but he likes to think he’s smiling as well. His eyes are the brown he barely remembers them ever being, his head is perfectly not pounding, whatever that feels like. 

 

They’re watching nothing in particular on the television, but it doesn’t matter what it is to either of them, they’re just there enjoying the moment. They’re both healthy enough to not have to live together, but they choose to because they want to. Hell, they might even be engaged or married, wouldn’t that be nice? His Trips, the Void, they’re both distant memories that they’ve entirely moved past. 

 

This is the thought Caddy holds most dear by a long shot, even if the likelihood of it ever coming true is miniscule. And, as he sits on the couch in the void, with Ian curled up beside him, weakly moaning, he figures perhaps the thought would comfort his partner, his love, his… whatever Ian was to him.

 

“Hey, Ian,” he started softly. A small groan indicated he was heard. “We’ll get out of here someday, okay?”

 

It took a moment for Ian to pull the strength together to respond. “B-but doesn’t this place help you?”

 

“So? It hurts you a lot, and I want to be with you a lot more than I want to be alright myself,” Caddy told him, pulling him in closer. “Besides, I’ll find a way to fix the trips too.”

 

“You think you can?”

 

He didn’t at all, but this wasn’t supposed to be the truth. It was supposed to get Ian to stop dwelling on all his pain. 

 

“I know I can,” he vowed. “I will, and we’ll both get out of here.”

 

A dry scoff came from the weakly breathing wad of purple beside him. “Don’t patronize me, James…”

 

That name, Ian was definitely joking with him. So, that at least was good. He flopped down beside Ian and wrapped his arms around him. “Can it, Lan,” he countered gently as he ran his fingers through Ian’s increasingly long hair. 

 

“Lan?”, Ian repeated. “The hell-?”

 

“Your name looks like that when you write it out,” he explained, pressing a kiss to Ian’s head. “Since you write everything in all lowercase besides your name.”

 

“Isn’t that how everything’s written but important words?”, Ian questioned. 

 

“And the beginning of sentences,” Caddy added.

 

Ian fell quiet for a moment before sighing. “I forgot… right…” 

 

He forgot something so basic? Quickly, Caddy pressed a hand to Ian’s forehead. He was ice cold. 

  
Fear constricted Caddy’s chest. How much worse could Ian get without something truly bad happening? How much time did he have?


	33. [Open Your Eyes AU Luke/PBG] Partnership

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello it is me, the trash who wanted desperately to write more of the OYE AU and more PBG/Luke.

“PBG, I want to ask you something,” Luke muttered, the flames of the campfire dancing in his eyes.

 

Looking at his companion, PBG leaned forward to listen to what else he had to say, but found he remained silent, so he cleared his throat and offered an awkward “okay, what?”

 

Not quite looking up, Luke sighed. “Our… our kingdoms are both in shambles. What’s left of our people are no better.”

 

A grave nod, he knew that all too well. “Yeah, and I’ll always hate that we couldn’t have been there to help.”

 

“We were- we are their future, PBG,” Luke assured them. “Us sleeping was the best thing we could do, I think.”

 

“Because they need us now?” Luke nodded, and PBG smiled a bit at the agreement. He’d been thinking that for a while but not quite put it into words. Truthfully, it was a reassuring thought, that they were in the right place and time.

 

“And, if anything good came out of this,” Luke continued, turning his eyes to the stars. “Well… they don’t hate each other any more. That war’s long gone, our people are living in peace with the little they have.”

 

He was right… In their travels, with all the people from both kingdoms they’d met, never once had they seen any fighting between their people. Heck, the cultures had blended in places, with people taking bits of the lives they once had and combining them to make something bright and new.

 

A smile came to his lips. “It’s kind of wonderful, don’t you think?”

 

Luke nodded. “I mean, it’s awful that it had to happen, but, it’s nice to know people can put all that aside when they need to help each other survive.”

 

“It’s like you and me, isn’t it?”, PBG suddenly blurted out. “We started out hating each other and now… well, I don’t think I could live without you, and I certainly wouldn’t have survived this long without you.”

 

He was sure Luke was smiling as well. “Yeah. You… you’ve become the person I rely on most, the person I care about most… We ended up stuck together, and, well, I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

 

PBG scooted a bit closer to his companion, close enough to lace their fingers together. “So, when this is all done… can we still be friends? When we’ve rebuilt, I mean… Our kingdoms have grown so close, we’ll be able to be allies, right?”

 

An odd smile, and Luke suddenly took his hand as if he were about to kiss it. But instead, he pulled out the signet ring he’d been wearing since long before they went to sleep, the one with the crest of his kingdom branded on it, and shook his head. “Actually I had something else in mind. Please, tell me if you don’t like it, but…”

 

Luke slid the ring onto PBG’s finger before taking a knee. “Our kingdoms have grown together,” Luke started with a deep breath. “And, we have as well. Separating either one seems unfair. So, perhaps we could make our kingdoms one and rule together?”

 

That… honestly made a lot of sense. PBG nodded in acceptance. But, as Luke continued to look at him expectantly, he realized he was missing part of this proposal.

 

“Wait… um, why did you give me the ring?”, he asked, and Luke looked at him for a solid minute like he was a complete idiot.

 

But suddenly, it all clicked. The ring, getting down on his knee, asking to join their kingdoms… “Luke, are you… asking me to marry you?”

 

Luke looked away suddenly, frowning. “I mean, I was, but…”

 

“Yes!”, PBG blurted out before he could think on it. “I mean… I don’t want to be apart from you, I want to protect you and see you happy, so…”

 

The smile returned to Luke’s face, and PBG let himself think of, and for the first time linger on, how beautiful that smile was.


	34. [Paul/Jared] Swerve I

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wanted to write some Paul/Jared stuff, king of the ship himself ianasagao gave me a prompt for an ice cream date. I made it awkward.

“Well this is…” Jared paused to take a bite of his sundae. “Awkward as all hell.”

 

Paul huffed and rolled his eyes, trying not to focus on the strange smirk across Jared’s face. “I swear to god, I will never make another bet with those two in my life.”

 

A shrug, Jared leaned forward on his elbow. “I mean, I was told I’d be meeting a hot guy here.”

 

Wow, thanks Jared, way to make things sting even more. “Well, you’ve got me,” he muttered. “Sorry.”

 

“No, no, they were right,” Jared assured him a bit too casually. “You just weren’t who I was expecting.”

 

Expecting? “Who else would you have expected, it was Nick and Josh who told you to come!”, he exclaimed. 

 

The entire ice cream place looked at him. Okay, yeah, he said that a bit loudly. But, Jared just frowned. 

 

“Honestly,” he started. “I thought Satch put them up to it; he keeps trying to set me up with Jirard.”

 

“Jirard?”, Paul repeated. To be fair, that was a far better match than him and Jared, but why Jirard specifically?

 

But Jared didn’t clarify, just nodded and went back to his ice cream.

 

Yep, he’d have to dig just a bit deeper for that. “Why Jirard?”, he whispered. 

 

And yep, Jared was staring at him like he was crazy. “You… okay, yeah, you’re Paul, what did I expect?”, Jared muttered, more to himself than anything. 

 

God, he was infuriating. How inappropriate was it to clock your date in his sparkly teeth again? 

 

“You’re going to have to be more specific than ‘Paul’s an idiot’ here,” he deadpanned. 

 

With a deep sigh, Jared leaned closer to him and spoke in a low whisper. “Alright, so Jirard and Shane are sorta going through a rough patch, taking a break or something, and Satch thought it might help him to see other people, but I’m really not interested. I mean, Jirard’s a great guy, anyone would be lucky to have him, but he just feels more like a broth-”

 

“Wait, what was that about Jirard and Shane?”, Paul questioned. 

 

“That they’re taking a break since their relationship isn’t going well?”, Jared repeated.

 

Okay, he had heard him right. “What relationship?”, he pressed further. 

 

“What relationship?” It was Jared’s turn to shout, and all eyes were drawn to him as his voice raised. “They’ve been dating for six months! Do you seriously not notice things like this? You work for the school newspaper for Palutena’s sake, that thing’s nothing but petty gossip! How can one human being be so handsome and oblivious at the same time?”

 

Wait, handsome? Jared seemed to notice he’d shouted this part as his face fell. And he’d said he counted as a cute boy earlier too…

 

He had to play this cool. “Jared, you should have told me earlier that this was an actual date,” he deadpanned. “I would have worn something nicer.”

 

Ooh, he’d made the sparkly human spotlight turn bright red, how lovely. 

 

“That- that…”, Jared stuttered. For once in his life, he seemed at a loss for words. 

 

But, Jared shook his head. “Look, yes, you’re attractive. I am attracted to you. There, happy?”

 

“Strangely, yes,” he admitted. Having Jared’s eyes on him was… well, to be fair, he did like the guy in a sort of capital-R Romantic sense. And in the he was a very attractive human being sense as well. 

 

“Then let’s go back to the school and put something nicer on, I’ll take you to dinner,” Jared muttered. 

 

Paul blinked a few times, trying to process what he’d just said. Did he… want to go on a date with Jared? 

 

“Alright, let’s go, then.” His mouth decided for him, and he finished off the last bits of his ice cream cone while Jared stared at him in complete disbelief. 

  
As they left, it struck Paul that neither of them had the slightest clue what they were doing. 


	35. [Continue] Swerve II

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For once, a direct sequel to the prior oneshot! Or more like I really wanted to write about Continue and the scenario I came up with would have been a waste not to attach to the one before it. Credit for the basic idea to a post I saw about Continue Headcanons~

Paul crashed into the dorm room in a strange panic.

 

“Josh, I need your help!” he cried. “Like, quick, please!”

 

Looking up from the homework he was actually doing for once, Josh gave his friend a strange look. “You… weren’t you on a date?”

 

“I’m still on a date!”, Paul shrieked. “That’s the problem!”

 

Nick let out a labored sigh from across the room. “Okay, you’re gonna have to give us more than that. Also, hello, reminder that I exist too.”

 

Groaning, Paul turned to his other roommate. “Yes, hi Nick, but I’m in a hurry and I really need Josh’s help in particular!”  

 

“I can’t think of what that could possibly mean,” Josh admitted, pushing his homework aside. “But whatever it is, explain it while I’m helping you.”    

 

A nod of agreement. “Okay, just real quick, I need something nice to wear,” he quickly explained.

 

“Something… nice to wear…” Yep, he knew exactly where this was going already.

 

Moving to sit down on the bed, Josh let out a sigh. “You want to ask Joshualina, right?”

 

“Either way! She’s better at getting it out quickly though!”

 

Putting the wig on and trying to focus, Joshualina realized she was lacking some pretty crucial information here.

 

“Before we do anything, you’ll have to tell me what you’re dressing for.”

 

Paul stared at her for a good ten seconds before nodding. “Jared ended up asking me to dinner, said to wear something nice. Not sure where we’re going, but knowing him, probably something on the ritzy end.”

 

This was all? God, Paul didn’t know how to do this himself by now? Granted, it wasn't like he had many dates to speak of, but still, this was basic! A bit surprising, maybe, but still basic!

 

“That suit you have for nice occasions is clean and pressed still,” she told him, throwing the closet door open. “This is a nice occasion, and I am not going to let you go out wearing anything less.”

 

“Ugh, I hate that thing,” Paul groaned. “Can’t I just wear that dress shirt you made me buy?”

 

Right, right. Fair enough- a first date wasn’t the best time to be terribly uncomfortable. “Fine, yes. Just wear a tie, at least.”

 

Pulling out a bloody red-colored tie, Paul seemed to start to ask if it was alright. Which it by no means was, she assured him with a shake of the head.

 

“That shade doesn’t work for you. Here,” she searched for a lighter blue one and threw it at him. “This one works better with you, and is more likely to match your date.”

 

Paul nodded and gave a grateful smile. “Thanks, ‘Lina. Don’t know what I’d do without you.”

 

“Embarrass yourself in front of one of the hottest guys in the school, apparently,” Nick added.         

 

“Oh, shut up, I do that on a daily basis.”                                                                                                                    


	36. [Ian/Luke] Too Lucky

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another idea I stole from Jasper, this one's Brutaltown, enjoy it dorks.

Alright, Luke told himself. Today would be the day he’d finally tell Ian how he felt. He’d actually bothered to try and look nice, he’d practiced what he’d say a thousand times- heck, he’d even gotten flowers! And, if he was lucky, Ian would end up liking him back and things would work out fine!

 

All he had to do was go up to him, give him the flowers, and say what he’d rehearsed. “Ian, you’re completely amazing and I’d be honored if you’d do me the honor of-” no, no, he couldn’t say honor twice in a row, what was he thinking? Maybe “I’d be honored if you’d go out with me?” Or more like “I’d be honored if you went out with me?” 

 

Ugh, the wording was too annoying. It was like any rap- he wanted to tweak the lyrics even after he recorded. Maybe just rephrase the whole line? “Ian, I really like you. Go out with me?” Or was that too direct? Maybe he’d-

 

Footsteps were coming his way. Shit. He ducked behind the corner of the building and heard a familiar voice. 

 

“If you like him so much, just ask him out!”, Jeff exclaimed, and Luke was afraid to look to see who it was. 

 

Deep breaths, deep breaths, it probably wasn’t Ian. Jeff had plenty of other friends he could be talking to, right? It could be Caddy or Jimmy or Wallid or PBG or even Paul or Jared! Jeff was a good person to go to for advice for anyone, not just Ian. 

 

But, the other person began talking and Luke nearly dropped the flowers he was holding. “You really think I have a chance?”, Ian asked.

 

“Definitely!”, Jeff affirmed, Luke’s heart sinking to the bottom of his stomach. 

 

Oh, it was probably someone better than Luke anyways. He probably liked someone kinder and smarter and warmer than him, someone that’d be better for him. 

 

Ian let out a sad little noise that broke his heart. “Really, you sure?”

 

“Of course!”, Jeff exclaimed. “He’s your friend, Ian! And he really cares about you!”

 

Someone who really cared about Ian… Luke tried to figure out who that could be. Caddy on good days, Wallid maybe, definitely not Jimmy, possibly Jared, could be PBG? But, what did it matter, whoever it was, surely they’d make Ian happy.

 

He didn’t quite believe what he was hearing when he heard what Ian said next. “Jeff, I don't know, is Luke even interested?”, he questioned out loud. 

 

Luke, Luke, the word rang in his ears out of shock. Before he could really properly react, he responded loudly. “Yes! Definitely! Absolutely!”

 

A small “huh?”, and Luke suddenly found himself embarrassed. But, he forced himself out from behind the corner, holding the flowers in front of him.

 

Ian just sort of stared at him in disbelief. Luke cleared his throat and gave an awkward laugh. 

 

“Ah, heh, funny story,” he started. “I was, um, just coming to find you, to give you these.” He waved the flowers he was holding, only remembering their purpose when a petal came flying off one of the peonies. “Uh, here!”

 

He handed them to Ian, who still seemed in shock. “You… you like me?”

 

“Yes!”, Luke exclaimed. “For, oh, gosh, a while now!”

 

Still, he was met with a blank stare. “Please tell me this isn’t a joke.”

 

A joke? Taking a step back, Luke could see how he’d think that. He just happened to burst out and tell him he liked him at the exact moment he was asking Jeff about those feelings. Suspicious, to say the least. So how could he prove he was serious?

 

His first instinct was a kiss, but that was definitely taking it a bit too far for so early into the relationship. At least clear the first five minutes first, right? 

 

So, instead, he made to hold Ian’s hand, or at least the one not holding the flowers. “Of course it isn’t a joke. Do I look like that much of an asshole to you?”

 

“Well, no, but-”

 

“No buts,” Luke interrupted. “You’re great, and I wanna take you on a date. Anywhere you want, your pick.”

 

That got Ian smiling. “Alright, let’s get coffee Saturday, at the place in the mall.”

 

“Sounds great sounds really, really great…” Luke trailed off, suddenly lost in Ian’s eyes. They were gorgeous, despite him having absolutely no clue what color they were. Blue? Grey? Green? It seemed to change by the second, but it was the prettiest color he’d ever seen.

  
He’d get to look into those eyes a lot more now, wouldn’t he?


	37. [Jimmy/Jeff] Honey Lemon

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one's dedicated to my dear, dear friend Jasper, who is the BEST and wanted more Jimmy/Jeff in the world!

“Hey, Jeff?” Jimmy knocked on the frame of the door before entering- a useless show of politeness when he clearly didn’t care for a go-ahead to enter. “How are you feeling?”

 

A groan left Jeff’s throat- about as loud a noise as he could make. “Sore…”, he muttered. “Throat hurts… k-kinda cold…”

 

“I’ll take care of that.” Jimmy picked a blanket up from the end of the bed and draped it over him. “Out of cough drops?”, he questioned, looking around. 

 

Jeff shook his head and pointed to the bedside table, where a few stray honey lemon cough drops were laying. 

 

“Alright, sit up and take one,” Jimmy prompted. 

 

Ugh… sitting? That sounded… ugh. He made a small groan to show his distaste for the idea. 

 

Some little cute chuckle came from Jimmy. “Alright, compromise- you sit up long enough to not choke on a cough drop and I’ll let you sit in my lap. I’ll even rub your back if you want!”

 

That sounded nice… Jeff slowly raised himself up as Jimmy slid behind him. Not exactly sitting on his lap, but then again he’d probably be less comfortable actually on his lap. 

 

Popping a cough drop in his mouth, Jeff tried to let himself relax, tried to ignore how everything ached. That was made a lot easier when Jimmy, true to his word, started to rub his back. Or, well, it was a bit too light to be rubbing, but it felt nice all the same. 

 

The cough drop slowly melted in his mouth and Jeff reached for a tissue to blow his nose. And, as he threw it on the floor, something occurred to him.

 

“I’m gonna get you sick too,” Jeff muttered. “Sorry…”

 

“Eh, don’t worry about it,” Jimmy assured him, pressing a kiss to his cheek. “I’m actually trying to get out of a test in two days, because I am soooooo not prepared and Ian said he remembered it being super hard, so maybe just breathe on me a bit?”

 

Jeff couldn’t help but laugh. “Is that all I’m good for? Germs?”

 

“Look, if I wanted germs I’d just make out with Shane, he’s had the flu for a week,” Jimmy assured him. “I wanna take care of you, alright? Getting sick would just be a bonus.”

 

A smile crept on his face. “Well, I can think of one way to help.” He turned around and pressed his lips against Jimmy’s.

 

His boyfriend turned bright red and giggled as he pulled away. “You taste like honey lemon.”

 

“Wow, wonder why?”, Jeff half-chuckled. The cough drop was nearly gone now, and had really helped. His throat only felt like it’d been run over twice instead of eighty times!

  
And, as it dissolved fully, he laid down in Jimmy’s lap. He could barely keep his eyes open, but he knew Jimmy was running his fingers through his hair gingerly and muttering sweet things under his breath. And honestly, he couldn’t think of a nicer way to fall asleep.


	38. [Wallid/Jimmy] The Cursed Prince and Lonely Princess

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Eli: *gives me a prompt for Waljom*  
> Me: *has 10000 feelings about Waljom and regurgitates a few of them*

In the pitch black of Jimmy’s room, on a rare night Caddy wasn’t there, Wallid heard Jimmy ask a strange question. 

 

“Why have you stuck with me so long, anyways?”

 

It was almost laughable. Jimmy was precious to him beyond words. He was… a lot of things to him. Too many, maybe. More a part of him than anything. 

 

“Do you need me to list the reasons out?”

 

Jimmy looked at him, his eyes shining faintly in the light of his phone screen. 

 

“A more interesting format would be nice,” Jimmy half-laughed. “Lists are boring as tar.”

 

True… Well, he did have a better way, one he’d been working on when falling asleep for months now. So, he stumbled towards the faint light in Jimmy’s eyes and onto the bed with him. 

 

“Alright then, how about a fairy tale for ya, princess?”

 

A dry laugh. “Alright, whatever.”

 

He took a deep breath and tried to think where to start. “Well, once upon a time, there was a prince with a frozen heart. His parents, the king and queen, cursed his heart to not feel love so he wouldn’t be weak when he took over the kingdom or bother marrying for anything but the interests of the kingdom- of his family.”

 

“How does this relate-”

 

“Let me finish,” Wallid huffed. “The prince’s heart remained frozen until he happened one day to meet the princess of another land- kind, gorgeous, and near as lonely as himself. The princess, noticing his sadness, offered him something he’d never experienced: affection. Holding him in his arms, the princess melted the ice around the prince’s heart and for the first time, the prince felt love and felt loved.”

 

It seemed to take a moment for Jimmy to figure out what he meant. But, Wallid could pinpoint the exact moment he did- the moment his arms started searching for Wallid’s form in the dark and wrapped around him. “Wal…”

 

A kiss to his temple, and Jimmy seemed to attempt and erase his tone of pity. “Heh, so I was your first love, huh?”

 

“You were the first person I ever loved,” Wallid corrected. 

 

He could feel Jimmy’s shrug. “Same thing. So, how does the story end?”

 

That was the whole story, honestly. But, he guessed he could go on. “The princess and prince became best friends, relying on each other and giving each other all of their affection and care. They made other friends- a bard, a knight, a sharpshooter, an astronomer- but, the prince always regarded the princess as something closer than a friend. The princess was the one person in all the world he loved most, and he would stay at his side for the rest of his days.”

 

A little chuckle. “Ooh, can I finish it?”, Jimmy requested.

 

“Uh, sure?” 

 

“Nice!”, Jimmy exclaimed. He paused for a moment to gather his words before nodding. “The princess, one night, told the prince that he meant all that and more to him. That he’d been cursed with self-doubt and loneliness for years before he came into his life. That the prince was the light of his life.”

 

Another kiss, this one on his cheek. “That he was in love with the prince.”

 

A little smile. Wallid couldn’t help it. “The prince rolled his eyes and told the princess that of course they were in love, they’d been in love for ages.”

 

A pause. “Wait, what?”

 

“Haven’t we been sorta not-officially together?”, Wallid questioned. “I mean, isn’t this a date?”

 

Jimmy sighed deeply. “Oh thank god. Yes, I just… I wasn’t sure since we’d never actually said the words.”

 

“Well, I love you,” Wallid assured him. “Officially, if you want.”

 

“I officially love you too,” Jimmy replied. 


	39. [Jeff/PBG] Gorgeous

“Hey, you alright?”

 

Jeff’s voice made PBG jump out of his own thoughts.

 

“O-oh! Um…” Was he alright? He wasn’t even entirely certain what he’d been thinking about… Just vacantly staring, actually. His friend’s eyes were nice to look at, was that weird?

 

Oh. Right. That train of thought he’d been falling down a few seconds at a time for a while now. Jeff’s pretty eyes, all sweet and soft and pleading like he was begging for a hug. His hugs were the best too, really.

 

“Peebs!”, Jeff called. “Come on, are you alright?”

 

Focus, focus. “Fine. Yes. Totally.”

 

A little pouty frown. “You’ve been staring off into space a lot when I talk to you lately,” he mused. “Am I boring you?”

 

“No, no!”, he quickly assured him. “It’s just…”

 

How did he put that, exactly? “You… you’re really pretty!”

 

Not like that. Never like that. PBG cursed his own stupidity, why did he say that? Jeff was turning away now, hiding his face in his hands.

 

“I… I’m pretty?”, he repeated.

 

“Uh… that came out wrong.”

 

A noise like a deflating balloon. “Oh. Course.”

 

“N-n-not that you aren’t pretty!”, he quickly backpedaled. “You’re gorgeous! I just didn’t mean to say it so bluntly!”

 

He was making it worse. Jeff pulled his hands away from his face to reveal a weird blush. “You… really think? That why you’ve been staring?”

 

“When you put it that way, it sounds creepy,” he muttered.

 

Jeff giggled rather pridefully. “I’m making you nervous!”

 

“Yes, actually,” he admitted. “I’m not sure what I said wrong, can you please enlighten me?”

 

“Nothing!”, Jeff assured him. “It’s just cute!”

 

Cute? That was just…

 

His thoughts were entirely derailed by a kiss to the cheek. It made every other thought melt away into irrelevancy. But, what other thought did he need but “my gorgeous friend is kissing me”?

  
Well, “my gorgeous friend is smiling at me after kissing me” might work too.


	40. [Caddy/Connor] Not a Lie

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had an awful idea that I ran by Tomate and Jasper and also Jasper's Discord wanted some Connor/Caddy bleh

God, Jimmy and Wallid were so sickening. Caddy’s two best friends seemed to want nothing more than to spite them with their ridiculous couple-y-ness. Alright, maybe Wallid wasn’t specifically going for spite, but Jimmy definitely was a little. He’d just sit in Wallid’s lap and give everyone that “don’t you wish you had a boyfriend” look, all smug and wrapped in eighty blankets.

 

And Ian was a thousand times worse, all flirty with Luke, and Luke would always flirt back without fail. Ugh, it was the worst, and darling Moosey would rub it in his face too. 

 

“Oh, would you stop that?”, he snapped as Ian flirted with Luke for the thousandth time. “I have a boyfriend, I don’t need to hear your gloating!”

 

Well, that just… came out. Everyone turned to look at him. 

 

“Since when?”, Ian questioned, raising an eyebrow. 

 

Uh… Caddy glanced at the clock on the wall. Yep, it was Digging Yourself Deeper Into The Hole o’clock! “A while,” he said as casually as he could.

 

“Seriously?” Jimmy huffed. “Then why haven’t you ever mentioned him? And why haven’t we ever seen you with him?”

 

“Long distance,” he blurted out. 

 

A frown from Luke. “Uh, dude, we share a room. I would have noticed if you’d been skype-dating someone.”

 

“Well, I don’t talk to him while you’re in the room!”, he countered. “That’s rude, flirting in front of other people.”

 

Ian rolled his eyes. Wallid looked away with a bit of a blush. Luke laughed awkwardly. Jimmy sighed. It was beautiful. 

 

“Well, what’s his name?”, Jeff questioned.

 

Shit. Shitshitshit. Shiiiit. Come on, think, name that would be believable!

 

“Connor.”

 

More shit. Everyone seemed to instantly know that name belonged to a friend of his. 

 

“Oh, the scarf guy?”, Jimmy questioned. 

 

He could say different Connor. Oh lord, could he say different Connor. But, he didn’t. He just nodded, biting his lip.

 

“Nice!”, Luke exclaimed. “Congrats, man.”

 

Well, that… happened. He… really needed to apologize to Connor for using his name there, didn’t he?

 

He did so as soon as he could get out of the meeting and duck into a spare closet. He called Connor up quickly and prepared an apology in the agonizingly long time it took him to answer,

 

“Huh? Caddy?”, he answered. “What’re you calling me for, I’m in class?”

 

Oops. Well, he wasn’t there anymore, so he’d make it fast. “I just need to apologize. I was pissed off at my friends and lied and said I had a boyfriend and I may have said it was you.”

 

A pause. Some faint laughter. “So I’m your fake boyfriend now?”, Connor questioned. 

 

“Apparently, but I’ll tell them in a few days or weeks you broke up with me,” Caddy assures him. “They’ll forget about it, anyways.”

 

More pausing. “Well, you know,” Connor started. “You know, if you say someone’s your boyfriend as a lie, you owe that person a date to make it up to them.”

 

His face flushed red. “O-oh?”

 

“Of course,” Connor practically giggled. “It’s a rule. So, when you come home for break, take me to dinner and we’re even!”

 

“Alright, but doesn’t that make it that I told the truth?”, he joked. “If I’m taking you on a date…”

 

Silence- or well, something was muffling the phone. But Connor soon returned. “Depends, do you want to be telling the truth?”

 

He’d blurted out Connor’s name for a reason, surely. And, he was cute, and he missed him a lot. 

 

“Yes.”

  
He could almost see Connor’s smile spreading. “Then yes. You told the truth.”


	41. [McJones/Dean] Chivalry

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ...I mean technically Dean and McJones are Asagao characters, right? They're mentioned a few times as players for the Asagao Strikers. And I like Minecraft Hardcore more than I should and have been dragged into shipping hell once again so like, here, have a tiny bit of fluff or something.

“Come on, we’re done with practice for the day, so let’s do something fun!”, Dean implored. 

 

McJones shuttered at the word “fun”. “You do realize your idea of ‘fun’ is most people’s ‘stupid and reckless’, right?”

 

Dean shrugged. “So? It’s fun! And it’s not like we ever get hurt or-!”

 

“Correction:”, McJones interjected. “I have saved your actual life like, ten times.”

 

Odd silence, and then an interjection. “Did I get _hurt_ , though?”, Dean pressed.

 

Sighing, McJones pinched the bridge of his glasses. “Yes!” He counted off Major Dean Injuries on his hand. “You’ve broken your arm twice, sprained an ankle three times, and gotten food poisoning bad enough to-”

 

A huff. “Fine, fine!”, Dean conceded. “Alright, so what if I’m the littlest bit reckless, you know why I’m still here?”

 

“Because I save your sorry ass?”, McJones deadpanned. 

 

“Exactly!”, exclaimed Dean, eyes shining and bearing into his own. “So why would I ever worry? I have my knight in shining armor who’ll come rescue me!”

 

He wouldn’t voice his fears that maybe one day he couldn’t protect his friend. So, he just hid that little blush, elbowed him and continued to walk back to the gym.

 

But, he couldn’t let that last part go. “Knight in shining armor? Really?”

 

Dean eagerly nodded. “Of course! You’ve saved me a ton, right? All we need is you pulling me onto a horse and riding into the sunset and that’s your job description.”

 

“I dunno, that sounds awfully…” Heroic? Like he wasn’t doing it out of genuine fear Dean would get hurt? Melodramatic? He searched for the right word.

 

“Romantic?”, Dean offered.

 

The word made him feel a bit strange around the cheeks, but yeah, it fit in the capital R Romanticization type of way. “Yeah. I’m not a hero, I’m just a friend who’s stressed out.”

 

“Just shut up and let me think you’re cool for once in my life,” Dean huffed. “It’s not going to happen again!”

 

“True. Fine, I’ll shut up and let you adore me,” McJones joked, anticipating a joking jab to the stomach. 

 

He didn’t expect the arm around his shoulder or the “gladly”.


	42. [Asamagica!Paul] It's Another Maze There

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is gonna be hard to explain. It's part of an AU myself and Tomate have been working on where Normal Boots, Hidden Block, Hana, and a few others are magical girls. So are the Game Grumps, but they're part of the "bad guys". Paul specifically has a powers that give him a mental link with Nick and Josh. I think that's all we really need for the setup?
> 
> Also this may be the strangest (one sided) pairing I've ever written for oooopppsss

How long had he been in this place? Paul felt like he’d been walking through the maze for days, but he couldn’t remember at all having stopped or rested or anything he surely would have done by now. 

 

Vaguely, he remembered how he’d gotten there. Josh had called him reckless, Nick had called him petty… oh god, Nick… His blood boiled at the thought but he couldn’t quite remember why beyond the sick feeling in his throat at the sight of his own reflection in the occasional shiny surface in this mess. 

 

He started to feel dizzy and unfocused. The walls of that place were turning into one of those magic eye things- disorienting and headache-inducing. Was this even a maze? Surely he could find his way out. Just go the way he came, or keep his hand on the left wall- or was it right? 

 

Focus, Paul! You’ll never get out like this! Just, deep breaths. Calm down. Did he bring any water or food? That might help. 

 

He searched his pockets, but found nothing, not even his phone. Odd, he wasn’t one to be that reckless. 

 

Of course, he’d left in a huff and a rush. Dammit, he was just proving Jeff’s point! Wait, no, Josh said that, not Jeff, why did he think Jeff?

 

Logic, Paul. You need to get out of the situation you’re in, not regret what you did. 

 

But, how? Just turn around? But he could never remember every turn he’d made… Maybe just stay still and wait for someone to find him? 

 

The world started to look fuzzy. His vision flickered like an old vhs tape. God, his head hurt….

 

Just lay down a minute. Just… Just...

 

A voice snapped him out of a delirium. “I can’t leave you like this… Just, come with me, okay?”

 

Paul realized he had somehow ended up on the floor. Looking up, he saw an only vaguely familiar guy with brown hair and a smile he didn’t quite trust offering a hand. 

 

“Who are you?”, Paul weakly asked, suddenly unable to focus on his own hand as it reached out to not yet take but linger in front of the stranger’s.

 

Said stranger shrugged. “Well, my name’s Ross, but I don’t think that’s what you meant. I’m about the only hope you have right now, ‘cause if you keep walking you’re just gonna keep getting glitchier.”

 

“Glitchier?”, he repeated, still trying to focus on his hand. The vhs static feeling remained. That… couldn’t be natural.

 

Ross nodded. “You’ll barely be able to walk if you stay any longer, and there’s no way in hell I could carry you. Unless you want me to get Brian and risk you dying on us, I need you to stand up and come with me.”

 

Fear overtook him and he did so without too much further questioning. Blood rushed to his head and he nearly fell over. 

 

A hand on his shoulder. “Take it easy. This won’t take long.”

 

Turning to the wall of the maze, which seemed far less magic eye-y than it had before, Ross put a hand up. The wall parted almost magically- or, well, definitely magically. 

 

“H-how…”

 

His savior just shook his head. “I didn’t realize how well my own trap worked, or how bad off you were. Honestly, I’m not even sure who you are, but I think Suzy would have a better idea.”

 

Paul wasn’t sure what to say, so he kept staggering forward as Ross parted the walls over and over until they reached a small room. What seemed to be a beanbag chair was beside the door, and without thinking, he fell into it the second Ross let go.

 

Things got hazy again, but a girl with black hair that was bleached in places leaned over him with a frown. “You’re sure he’s not corrupted?”, she asked.

 

“Not certain,” Ross interjected, sitting down and stretching. “But, isn’t this like what happened to Ryan and Matt?”

 

Someone stood up from a computer and came over. “It looks like mental connection strain,” they (he? It was hard to tell with how blurry things got…) muttered. “But I mean, corruption looks like a lot of things.”

 

Yet another person came over- this one with pink hair. “He’s not corrupted,” she assured them. “So yeah, probably a mental link getting broken or strained.”

 

“Well, his partners will surely come for him,” the first girl stated. “Until then, the best we can do for him is make sure he doesn’t strain himself and gets rest and food.”

 

“Order pizza,” Ross ordered. “And, um, Barry, where are the paper towels?”

 

“If we had any, they’d be with Arin’s stuff,” said the computer guy.

 

The first girl threw a too small looking roll at Ross. He muttered a thank you before getting a bottle of water from… well, Paul zoned out and didn’t catch much before the damp paper towel was on his forehead. 

 

“There,” Ross muttered. “I think that should help? Shit, I don’t know, does it help?”

 

Paul felt his cheeks get hotter, but he still nodded.

 

“Great. Just, try and rest until food comes.”


	43. [Asamagica PBG] Odds and Ends

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Same universe as the last one! Context needed: PBG's the only one in Normal Boots who isn't a Magical Girl, Creeps is sort of the mentor to all the Magical Girls at Asagao and a Kitsune.
> 
> Also, I'm gonna be writing a lot more one shots in this universe, so should I move them to another story? Just tell me what you think, because I already have a few more written- out of order, but still.

“So, PeanutButterGamer, what seems to be the problem?” Creeps smirked as PBG sat down, as if he already knew the answer.

 

A deep breath- where did he start? “Um… Well… I- I’ve just been completely useless to everyone…”

 

That was met with a frown. “Oh dear,” Creeps muttered. “Isn’t this something you should be talking to, oh, maybe the school counselors about?”

 

“No, let me finish!”, PBG exclaimed. “That’s not what I meant! I meant I’m feeling useless to my friends because I don’t have magic!”

 

That seemed to get through to him. “Ah. Well still, there isn’t much I can do,” he stated flippantly.

 

No, he was his only hope… “B-but… but Jirard said Kitsunes gave humankind power! And you’re a Kitsune!”

 

“That I am, but I’m not nearly that powerful,” Creeps countered, still sounding dismissive. “I’m only, oh, a few centuries old, wasn’t even around when we gave humans powers!”

 

“So there’s nothing you can do for me?” No, that couldn’t be all! “Don’t you awaken everyone’s powers?”

 

“Well, to be honest, they usually awaken on their own if I don’t intervene,” Creeps explained away. “I just make things a bit easier on them.”

 

Why did he keep dismissing him? “Answer me!”, PBG exclaimed. “How can you help me help everyone?”

 

“Hm…” Finally, he seemed to actually be considering it. “Well, there’s one thing I could do, in theory. But, it’s reckless, dangerous, and I can only do it once.”

 

“Please…”, he begged again.

 

“Now would be the most dangerous time to do it too, so normally I wouldn’t even consider it,” Creeps went on.

 

“I’ll be super careful, just please! I wanna fight!”

 

For a moment, Creeps seemed to close his eyes, even if they were hidden. He went dead silent. The room seemed to darken. And then he reopened them and looked straight at PBG.

 

“It’s strange,” he mused. “Your aura… it’s weak- too weak for it to ever amount to anything naturally. But, you definitely do have magic in you. That’s a rare combination. It almost feels like…” 

 

He suddenly turned back to a file on his desk. “Tell me, PeanutButterGamer- is there a reason you remind me of Stewart Hargrave? Or is that just a coincidence?”

 

The room felt cold. Just what he’d been afraid of being asked, but there was no reason to lie anymore. Under his breath, he found himself muttering “he never liked that name”.

 

Creeps smiled slightly. “What was it he introduced himself as? McJones Rylie?”

 

“Yeah… McJones… He’s… he’s my brother.”

 

“Ah. So, taking strange aliases runs in the family?”

 

“Well… I mean, last time I told someone my family name they stopped talking to me for years and thought I was connected to some dark magic. Didn’t really make me too fond of being called Austin anymore.”

 

He felt a little sick at the memory of the other end of the skype call going dead after he said his full name. 

 

Creeps just nodded. “Completely understandable. I take it you’re a bit envious you weren’t the heir to your family’s powers, right?”

 

“I mean…” He paused for a minute. He’d been jealous when he was little, but to be honest, he’d always felt those powers rightfully belonged to McJones. Not him. “Not that he has them instead of me, I just… I want powers of my own too…” He added a little sad pout.

 

A thoughtful hum from the nurse. “Well, I suppose if ever an extra set of powers were needed it would be now…”

 

PBG’s heart swelled a bit. “Thank you!”, he exclaimed. “I won’t let you down! I’ll be the heroiest hero ever!”

 

“I didn’t say yes!”, Creeps corrected, digging something from out of his desk. “But, well, this is very, very dangerous. If you do take this- if you do borrow some power, you won’t be able to tell a single human being about your powers. Could you do that?”

 

No one? But, how would that work? How could he protect his friends without them knowing?

 

“I- I’ll wear a mask!”, he mused. “I can protect them without them knowing!”

 

Creeps was definitely smiling now. “I think you’ll be safe. Here.”

 

He offered a blue pendant shaped like a feather- one PBG took immediately. He felt warmer just holding it. 

 

This would give him the strength to protect his friends. This would let him be strong like his brother- like Jared and Jirard and Satch and everyone. He’d guard what he loved with all his heart with all he had.


	44. [Luke/Matpat] What You Own

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so i accidentally decided this ship should be a thing  
> and accidentally wrote a thing for it
> 
> sue me i want them to be dorks together
> 
> and i really like rent okay

Luke almost squealed when the song came up on his playlist and quickly shook Mat out of his intense focus on that book he was reading. Though confused at first, as the opening bars of the song played, Mat’s eyes lit up and he quickly turned to meet Luke’s eyes. 

 

“Don’t think too deep, don’t think all day-”

 

Really, the two of them had figured out they had something special upon figuring out they shared the same favorite song from MENT, a musical the two of them both regarded quite fondly. So, it’d become a tradition that whenever the song came up on one of their playlists, they’d drop everything and just belt it out.

 

But, of course, they were in Luke’s dorm room, meaning next door and well within earshot was-

 

“SHUT THE FUCK UP!”, Caddy screamed at them from the next door. Asagao’s thin walls easily allowed for his words to carry to them, but even if they hadn’t been so thin, they suspected he wouldn’t have been hard to hear. “SOME OF US HAVE BETTER THINGS TO DO THAN SCREAM YOUR DUMB SONGS!”

 

Mat sighed. “Maybe we should do it a bit quieter,” he conceded. 

 

Luke just smirked. “HEY, MAYBE WE SHOULD JUST WATCH MENT AT THE NEXT HIDDEN BLOCK MEETING!”, he shouted back just as loudly. “I’M SURE JIMMY AND WALLID AND JEFF WOULD BE ON BOARD, AND I COULD BRIBE MOOSEY SOMEHOW!”

 

“I WILL LITERALLY PAY YOU NOT TO DO THAT,” Caddy responded. “PLEASE. NO.”

 

Chuckling a bit, Luke restarted the song. “So, where were we?”, he asked Mat. 

 

After quickly kissing him on the cheek, Mat started belting it out from the top once more.

 

 


End file.
